Dating Christians - The Best Advice You Will Ever Hear
I've heard some good advice for Christians who are dating but
the advice given here goes a little beyond the standard fare.
Included in this advice is a question to ask your prospective
mate, don't miss this one.
There are four things any Christian should do if they are
dating. I borrowed a name for the four from the old mustard
colored tract made so famous by Bill Bright's organization,
Campus Crusade for Christ. I call them "The Four Spiritual Laws
of Dating. Although they are pointed at Christians in general I
am sure they would work for anyone. I suppose to work on just
anyone it might require that the reader first read the original
"Four Spiritual Laws" tract, and believe it.
1. Keep All The Rules of The Scripture. There are quite a few
laws and rules set forth in the scripture about dating. Keep
them all. Examples are, not having sex before marriage, not
being unequally yoked to unbelievers and the study of the
principles and examples of a good marriage as set forth in the
Bible. If you don't know what these things are then you should
be reading your Bible and seeking a Pastor or good Christian
counselor to help you.
2. Pray About Every Aspect of Your Dating and Your Intention To
Marry. This is not simple or rudimentary advice it is absolute
bottom line essential advice. Miss this and you have missed the
boat. Pray about your potential mate, pray with them and pray
together with others as well. God is always honored when we
include him in all our intentions and decision. To leave him out
of such a major decision (marriage) is ridiculous and could only
be insulting to God. Remember he is not just Jesus, he is the
Lord Jesus.
3. Take Your Time. Rome wasn't built in a day, but it is not
Rome Satan is constantly attacking. Marriage, especially good
marriages are under constant attack in today's atmosphere of
throw away relationships. The breakup of the established fabric
of most societies is something that prophecy predicts as one of
the precursors to a time of anarchy and the rule of the worlds
last dictator, the antichrist. Marriage is pretty high on the
list of things to destroy in Satan's agenda, don't let him put
yours on his list. Take time to look to listen to weigh your
choice, thus giving God time to answer you back as you go.
4. Ask Your Prospective Mate this All Important Question. I
wasn't lucky enough to have heard this advice when I was a young
man. I would have given a kingdom to acquire it and I have never
seen it fail anyone in many decades of telling it to others. I
originated this test but I must say I was always sure it was God
inspired.
You must pose the question within specific parameters for it to
work. First you must be sure that you tell your mate that this
is a question that they might ask themselves if they were in a
comfortable place where they go to sit and meditate or pray. You
are not asking the question, they are asking it of themselves.
No one accept the insane and fools would ever lie or try to
deceive themselves. You would ask them, if they were alone in a
comfortable place, a place they liked to be in to think and
pray, and if they were to ask themselves one single question,
what would their answer be, to themselves?
The question is. "If I could summarize in three sentences or
less what I want out of life, what would my answer be to
myself." Let them ponder this question, don't rush the answer
but take their answer with utmost seriousness. People will
rarely lie to themselves and the answer will be the truth almost
without fail. If they say I just want to love and be loved, or I
just want some security in life, or I want to get the best
things in life or follow a career...those are the real and
lasting answers, you can count on it. If you should not marry
that person but were to come around to see them for a period of
one or two or fifty years you would see one thing, they would
have found the things they told you they wanted or they would
still be looking for them.
What has all this got to do with anything? Only everything! By
posing the question as outlined with an honest person you will
have boiled the forty gallons of sap it takes to make a quart of
grade "A" maple syrup. You can believe the answer; you can also
be guided by the answer. That is, you can decide if the answer
conjuncts with your own answer to yourself about your own life.
Comparing all of the common likes and dislikes you have with
your prospective mate or having long intimate discussions is a
good thing. But life is in motion; everyone has a direction real
or perceived. Find out what that direction is before marriage
and you will not crash against it after you are married.
Whoso findeth a wife (mate) findeth a good thing, and obtaineth
favour of the Lord. Proverbs 18:22