Successful Dating Begins With Successful Flirting: 11 Flirting
Tips For Work and Play
Why are some people born natural flirts and others couldn't
charm the backside of a bus if their life depended on it?
The power of flirting goes beyond attracting the opposite sex.
Master the art of flirting and you also become a friend magnet
and can use your skills to influence business relationships.
"You've either got it or you haven't!" is often what you will
hear men saying when they boast about their conquests. Women, on
the other hand, are more coy when talking about a man they have
met. So as not to appear full of herself, she will often say to
her friends "Oooh, I don't think he likes me, what do you
think?" If she is a successful flirt, however, she will be
thinking along the same lines of a man, "Yeah, he was putty in
my hands!"
Flirting is an art requiring confidence without being OTT. A
successful flirt knows how to get the balance just right; too
much and there is a real danger you will be labelled as "slimy"
(if you're a man) and "tarty" (if you're a woman).
If flirting doesn't come naturally to you, you can learn to
flirt by building your confidence, believing in yourself and
interacting with other people.
Here are some basic flirting tips which can be practised at
work and/or on a social scene.
1. Have Fun!
First and foremost flirting is fun! Whether you are the flirter
or the flirtee it makes both parties smile (on the inside as
well as the outside!). Don't take it seriously; be playful, be
light-hearted, be infectious!
2. Ooze Confidence
The best flirts have a positive outlook on life and are happy
with themselves. To successfully flirt you need to feel good
about yourself before you are able to transmit this "feel good"
factor to the opposite sex. If you display a positive and
optimistic attitude to life you will find yourself connecting
with people who are right for you.
3. Make the first move
Don't wait for someone to approach you. If it's someone at work
you've got your eye on, wait for them to go to the kitchen and
then make a beeline for the coffee machine. The same applies in
a bar, wait for them to go to the bar and then squeeze in next
to them. Start with a simple "Hello" and take things from there.
What have you got to lose?
4. Pay a compliment and receive a smile!
A genuine compliment costs nothing and yet can make someone
feel so special. If someone looks great, tell them! If someone
has achieved something to be proud of, tell them! Once you start
making someone feel good about themselves, they are more likely
to want to spend more time with you! And if someone pays you a
compliment, be proud of the compliment and say "Thank you"!
5. Eye to Eye Contact
Eye contact is one of our most powerful communicating
mechanisms. Most people don't have a problem making eye contact
with someone they don't find attractive but they become awkward
in front of people they are attracted to. If you tend to look
away at people you like, practice making eye contact with people
on your way to work, a quick glance and then turn away. This is
a good way to build up your confidence. Don't stare, however,
this will make people feel uncomfortable!
6. Pitch your voice
Learn to vary the tone, pitch and speed of your voice. A voice
rich in tones sounds far more interesting than one dull note!
7. Listen
A good flirt has the ability to get people to open up and talk
about themselves. Pay attention when someone is talking to you
and ask questions to show you are interested. The best questions
are the ones which will lead to someone remembering a positive
experience about themselves.
8. Move your body!
There are many positive body language signs: lingering eye
contact, smiling widely, touching someone, head tilting to one
side, running fingers through hair, undivided attention but if
you really want to let go and flirt openly - dance! Dancing is a
great form of self-expression allowing you to interact with
someone and connect.
9. Smile, Smile, Smile!
Make your smile contagious! The more you smile the more people
will want to know you and be around you!
10. Don't be rude!
Flirting does not involve being sexually explicit! Nor does it
involve being offensive if someone rejects your advances. If you
have been flirting with someone and are not receiving positive
feedback don't get disheartened or take it personally, move on
to the next person! You may want to consider a different
approach if you are getting a lot of rejections.
11. Send an email
Emails are a great way to communicate with someone if you're
too shy to approach them face to face. Whether it's someone you
are interested in at work or you want to try internet dating,
emails and instant messaging allow you to flirt without blushing
or getting tongue-tied.
Be careful not to become intimate online too quickly though;
it's easy to paint a rosy picture of the person behind the
monitor but until you have met them you don't really know them.
My message here is get to know someone online before arranging a
date, but don't fall in love before meeting them! The reality
could burst the bubble!