Poker Purgatory
Being a dealer I have seen many interesting games of poker along
with many strange people at the table. Out of all the weird and
wonderful people and all the memorable games one particular day
stands out above the rest.
I had been in an irritable mood all day. This was mainly due to
a work shirt that was too tight, plus the fact that I had to
miss lunch because the mentioned shirt was too tight. Someone
spilling a drink over my tight shirt, forcing me to wear the
spare shirt at work that was tighter still, capped this off.
Near the end of my shift I sat down to the poker table to deal I
did the only thing I could do, stick my head down and deal. But
as always I found myself being drawn into the game and soon
forgot about my missed meal or the shirt that was constricting
my now empty stomach.
It was shortly after I had relaxed that a slight surge went
through the casino causing all the lights to dim and then
flicker for a few seconds. The game went dead and everyone
looked around nervously but I reassured everyone that it
happened from time to time and not to worry. The tension being
relieved on the table, we continued the game.
A few hands later a seat became available after some gentleman
made a bad play resulting in him losing the remainder of his
chips. As the player walked away another man walked up and sat
down, immediately causing everyone to stop what he or she had
been doing.
Dressed entirely in black, he wore an expensive looking suit,
silk shirt and a pair of sunglasses that where blacker than a
moonless night. With his sleeked back snow-white hair and all
the jewelry worn, the man just oozed wealth. There was something
else about him too that was just that bit unsettling. From the
way the table had reacted when he sat down I wasn't the only
one. It was his smile that really unnerved me.
Taking a seat, the man in black proceeded to place a large
amount of chips in front of him. At the sight of all those chips
a number of players gave a big grin and forgetting their unease,
welcomed him to the table. Others just looked worried, figuring
they might be in over their head.
Looking at me with his soulless glasses he asked, "So what are
we playing here then?"
"Err, $1/2 no limit holdem," I stammered.
Giving that unnerving smile of his again he said, "Excellent,
just what I need to relax with. And what would our dealer's name
be?"
Not comfortable with the attention I was getting from him I
again mumbled "Michael Sir."
"Excellent, excellent. My friends call me Luc."
I could tell by the look on everyone else's face that they where
thinking the same thing that I was, I wouldn't want to be this
guy's friend. It didn't take long though for everyone to come to
the conclusion that they didn't even want to be near Luc.
The first incident came when he came down to the river card and
it was heads up between Luc and one other player. Luc had just
pushed a huge stack of his chips in and it was obvious the other
player was about to call. But before the gentlemen had a chance
to call the bet Luc turned to the man and asked, "so how is your
wife Claudia?"
Caught slightly off guard the man replied with a confused look,
"um she's well."
"Excellent." His eerie smile returning he asked, "and Mrs.
Hampshire, how is she these days?"
Eyes boggling, the man just sat there slowly looking around the
table. He then stood up, announced he was folding and walked
away from the table as quickly as possible. Everyone else on the
table just looked at each other confused. I just groaned, and it
wasn't from the tight shirt.
Continuing on I found the game had changed slightly with most
players folding out immediately anytime Luc came in. I could see
a few people getting a bit annoyed by him and this was made more
apparent when he pulled a cigar and proceeded to light it up.
Immediately the man to the left of Luc got upset. "Excuse me sir
but you can't smoke those here."
As the dealer on the table I knew it was my job to enforce the
rule of no cigars, so I jumped in before it got out of hand.
"I'm sorry sir but it is the house rules, no cigars." Trying to
lighten things up I smiled and added, "Besides those things will
kill you."
Turning from the complaining player to me, Luc lowered his
sunglasses slightly to reveal his ice blue eyes. My smile
vanished. Cocking one eyebrow he just stared at me. "Really?"
Seeing Luc's eyes the complaining player immediately grabbed his
chips and left the table along with one other player. Luc
replaced his glasses, shrugged and returned the cigar to his
pocket. "Wouldn't want to upset anyone would we?"
Not long after this another incident occurred. Luc turned over a
pair of kings to make four a kind and win a big pot only to have
another player complain that he had thrown away a king and that
it was impossible for Luc to have four of kind. Checking through
the cards we found no extra king and all other cards accounted
for. Apologizing the man left along with the lady who lost the
hand.
Leaving only one other player it only took a few hands before he
too got up and left. Luc looked at me and smiled. "Don't worry,
I have a... colleague of mine coming along shortly to join me.
Should be an interesting game."
True to his word within a few minutes an absolutely stunning
lady walked up to the table. She was dressed in a mostly plain
white dress with hints of gold and silver in the sash she had
around her waist. She had long flowing jet-black hair and deep
ocean green eyes. Amazingly I couldn't even begin to guess her
age and seeing her a funny warm feeling came over me and it
wasn't from the guy downstairs. She sat down with a large stack
of chips of her own not looking very impressed. "I see yet again
we have a table all to our own."
Luc just smiled back at her. "Yes its funny how that always
happens. Don't know what it is really."
Squinting at him she said, "Right! Now none of your funny
business and don't try anything with the dealer either," she
looked to me and gave me a warm smile, "He's one of mine."
"All right. You really do try to take the fun out of things."
With that they proceeded to start the game and even though I
realized something wasn't right with things I managed to deal
the game. The game went back and forwards for a while with them
chatting mainly about religion and philosophy. There where very
few incidents, though I could swear at one stage in a pot that
Luc won, that I had seen a chip slide across the table from one
of his stacks into the pot before the end of the hand.
After a while Luc stopped the game and turned to the lady in
white. "I'm getting bored of this. Why don't we play for
something a little more interesting, spice up the game a little
eh?"
Looking at Luc cautiously the lady asked, "so what do you have
in mind then?"
"I was thinking maybe we could play for a church or two."
The lady in white shook her head. "You know I don't like playing
for churches, there is always a lot of mess involved." Looking
thoughtful for a moment she asked, "how about we play for the
world?"
"No. Every time we play for the world you always seem to win. If
I didn't know better, I'd say you were cheating" said Luc,
giving his opponent a suspicious look. This went on for a while,
neither player being able to agree on what the other suggested.
The whole time this was going on I was starting to get seriously
worried as I was getting a very suspicious feeling that the two
in front of me were people I shouldn't have to have in front of
me for a number of years yet. I was also coming to think that I
shouldn't have Luc in front of me at all... ever!
It was just as I was thinking about trying to sneak away from
the table that Luc suddenly looked at me. "How about we play for
him?"
Giving me a quick look over she said, "I might be inclined to
put him up but what are you willing to stake against him?"
"I win then he's mine. If you win then..." Luc waved his right
hand around in the air a bit "... then he gets one of his wishes
granted without all the - you know - usual attachments that come
along with it."
The lady in white thought about this for a short time before
nodding, "Then its agreed. But no cheating or any of your usual
tricks."
"Yes, yes, yes. I will be on my best behavior."
Waving a finger at Luc the lady added, "you break any of the
rules and he gets his wish."
I know he was wearing his sunglasses but I could swear that he
was rolling his eyes at the lady. "Excellent. Then we have a
deal and a game, shuffle away Michael." This was about the point
I came to the realization of who was playing in front of me. I
started dealing the game even though I was having a hard time
with the cards, what with my soul on the line and all.
They had both agreed to a no limit, heads up style game of
holdem, each starting out with 1500 in chips. Once again the
back on forwards of the previous game started up. Ever so slowly
Luc was gaining a lead on the heavenly white figure to my left.
At one stage my heart stopped when she went all in, to my relief
Luc folded out that hand.
I was a little nervous too, when Luc raised the lady in white
with an all in of his own. She sat there for a long time looking
at her cards as well as taking a long look into the bleak
sunglasses of Luc. Finally she laid down the hand increasing
Luc's lead considerably. I exhaled not realizing that I had been
holding my breath.
Slowly though the Lady in white made a steady come back until
once again they were about even. After dealing out their hole
cards for another hand there was suddenly a very serious tension
in the air. Luc raised the ladies blind bet and she in turn
called.
I slowly dealt out the three flop cards, an eight of hearts, an
ace of spades and finally a six of diamonds. Staring each other
down Luc was quick to bet with the lady in white smiling at him
the entire time.
It was very obvious that this was most likely going to be the
hand that decided my fate for the rest of eternity. I was
starting to really hate the shirt I was wearing along with the
bottle of water I had before coming to the table. Those two
factors and the tense situation I was in really put a lot of
pressure on my bladder.
Crossing my legs under the table I dealt out the turn card,
which was a jack of diamonds. Again Luc pushed out a decent
portion of his stack. With little hesitation and the same wry
smile on her face, the lady called.
Another pause was needed to keep a hold of my bladder before I
dealt out the final card, another six. Luc knocked the table,
checking to his opponent who immediately announced, "All in,'
before pushing her remaining stack of chips into the middle of
the table.
I groaned audibly at the obvious ploy. Luc looked at both of us
with that damned (no pun intended) smile of his. "Well it looks
like luck is on my side today, I call."
Standing up Luc through his cards face up into the middle of the
table, "four of a kind, sixes."
Turning over her cards to show two eights, the lady announced.
"Four of a kind, eights."
Luc's face scrunched up, "Hang on one minute. You can't have
four of a kind because there is only one... two eights."
There was a slight pause on the table as Luc scratched his pure
white hair, somehow managing not to move a single hair. I was
looking at the same thing he was, the first card I had dealt
out. What I had thought had been a six of diamonds was in actual
fact an eight of diamonds.
Immediately Luc turned on me. "You switched the card didn't you?"
This wasn't good but all I could do was tell the truth. "Um why
would I switch the card when I don't know what she was holding?"
Scratching his head Luc looked a little confused, it was the way
his sunglasses scrunched up at the middle, "Umm... well you
see..." he paused for a moment. "Ah shit."
Not entirely impressed Luc grabbed the rest of his chips and
walked away from the table. The lady in white stood up and
smiled once more. "Next time Lucy!"
Luc stopped, clenched his fists for a second, mumbled something
and then walked off. Looking to me the lady said, "well it seems
you get to keep your soul."
"Not to be ungrateful or anything but I get a wish too right?"
"You already got it. Take a deep breath," she replied.
Looking at her quizzically I did just that. To my surprise there
was no strain around my waist. I now had a shirt that fitted
like a glove and surprisingly that made my day. As the lady
started to walk away I had to ask, "that was a six wasn't it?"
The lady turned around and winked, "might have been."
"I thought you weren't allowed to do that?"
Walking away she replied, "How do you think good always triumphs
over evil?"
Ever since that game I have always tried to do a little good
each day, that and I wouldn't curse next time I got a tight
shirt.
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