Poker Purgatory

Being a dealer I have seen many interesting games of poker along with many strange people at the table. Out of all the weird and wonderful people and all the memorable games one particular day stands out above the rest. I had been in an irritable mood all day. This was mainly due to a work shirt that was too tight, plus the fact that I had to miss lunch because the mentioned shirt was too tight. Someone spilling a drink over my tight shirt, forcing me to wear the spare shirt at work that was tighter still, capped this off. Near the end of my shift I sat down to the poker table to deal I did the only thing I could do, stick my head down and deal. But as always I found myself being drawn into the game and soon forgot about my missed meal or the shirt that was constricting my now empty stomach. It was shortly after I had relaxed that a slight surge went through the casino causing all the lights to dim and then flicker for a few seconds. The game went dead and everyone looked around nervously but I reassured everyone that it happened from time to time and not to worry. The tension being relieved on the table, we continued the game. A few hands later a seat became available after some gentleman made a bad play resulting in him losing the remainder of his chips. As the player walked away another man walked up and sat down, immediately causing everyone to stop what he or she had been doing. Dressed entirely in black, he wore an expensive looking suit, silk shirt and a pair of sunglasses that where blacker than a moonless night. With his sleeked back snow-white hair and all the jewelry worn, the man just oozed wealth. There was something else about him too that was just that bit unsettling. From the way the table had reacted when he sat down I wasn't the only one. It was his smile that really unnerved me. Taking a seat, the man in black proceeded to place a large amount of chips in front of him. At the sight of all those chips a number of players gave a big grin and forgetting their unease, welcomed him to the table. Others just looked worried, figuring they might be in over their head. Looking at me with his soulless glasses he asked, "So what are we playing here then?" "Err, $1/2 no limit holdem," I stammered. Giving that unnerving smile of his again he said, "Excellent, just what I need to relax with. And what would our dealer's name be?" Not comfortable with the attention I was getting from him I again mumbled "Michael Sir." "Excellent, excellent. My friends call me Luc." I could tell by the look on everyone else's face that they where thinking the same thing that I was, I wouldn't want to be this guy's friend. It didn't take long though for everyone to come to the conclusion that they didn't even want to be near Luc. The first incident came when he came down to the river card and it was heads up between Luc and one other player. Luc had just pushed a huge stack of his chips in and it was obvious the other player was about to call. But before the gentlemen had a chance to call the bet Luc turned to the man and asked, "so how is your wife Claudia?" Caught slightly off guard the man replied with a confused look, "um she's well." "Excellent." His eerie smile returning he asked, "and Mrs. Hampshire, how is she these days?" Eyes boggling, the man just sat there slowly looking around the table. He then stood up, announced he was folding and walked away from the table as quickly as possible. Everyone else on the table just looked at each other confused. I just groaned, and it wasn't from the tight shirt. Continuing on I found the game had changed slightly with most players folding out immediately anytime Luc came in. I could see a few people getting a bit annoyed by him and this was made more apparent when he pulled a cigar and proceeded to light it up. Immediately the man to the left of Luc got upset. "Excuse me sir but you can't smoke those here." As the dealer on the table I knew it was my job to enforce the rule of no cigars, so I jumped in before it got out of hand. "I'm sorry sir but it is the house rules, no cigars." Trying to lighten things up I smiled and added, "Besides those things will kill you." Turning from the complaining player to me, Luc lowered his sunglasses slightly to reveal his ice blue eyes. My smile vanished. Cocking one eyebrow he just stared at me. "Really?" Seeing Luc's eyes the complaining player immediately grabbed his chips and left the table along with one other player. Luc replaced his glasses, shrugged and returned the cigar to his pocket. "Wouldn't want to upset anyone would we?" Not long after this another incident occurred. Luc turned over a pair of kings to make four a kind and win a big pot only to have another player complain that he had thrown away a king and that it was impossible for Luc to have four of kind. Checking through the cards we found no extra king and all other cards accounted for. Apologizing the man left along with the lady who lost the hand. Leaving only one other player it only took a few hands before he too got up and left. Luc looked at me and smiled. "Don't worry, I have a... colleague of mine coming along shortly to join me. Should be an interesting game." True to his word within a few minutes an absolutely stunning lady walked up to the table. She was dressed in a mostly plain white dress with hints of gold and silver in the sash she had around her waist. She had long flowing jet-black hair and deep ocean green eyes. Amazingly I couldn't even begin to guess her age and seeing her a funny warm feeling came over me and it wasn't from the guy downstairs. She sat down with a large stack of chips of her own not looking very impressed. "I see yet again we have a table all to our own." Luc just smiled back at her. "Yes its funny how that always happens. Don't know what it is really." Squinting at him she said, "Right! Now none of your funny business and don't try anything with the dealer either," she looked to me and gave me a warm smile, "He's one of mine." "All right. You really do try to take the fun out of things." With that they proceeded to start the game and even though I realized something wasn't right with things I managed to deal the game. The game went back and forwards for a while with them chatting mainly about religion and philosophy. There where very few incidents, though I could swear at one stage in a pot that Luc won, that I had seen a chip slide across the table from one of his stacks into the pot before the end of the hand. After a while Luc stopped the game and turned to the lady in white. "I'm getting bored of this. Why don't we play for something a little more interesting, spice up the game a little eh?" Looking at Luc cautiously the lady asked, "so what do you have in mind then?" "I was thinking maybe we could play for a church or two." The lady in white shook her head. "You know I don't like playing for churches, there is always a lot of mess involved." Looking thoughtful for a moment she asked, "how about we play for the world?" "No. Every time we play for the world you always seem to win. If I didn't know better, I'd say you were cheating" said Luc, giving his opponent a suspicious look. This went on for a while, neither player being able to agree on what the other suggested. The whole time this was going on I was starting to get seriously worried as I was getting a very suspicious feeling that the two in front of me were people I shouldn't have to have in front of me for a number of years yet. I was also coming to think that I shouldn't have Luc in front of me at all... ever! It was just as I was thinking about trying to sneak away from the table that Luc suddenly looked at me. "How about we play for him?" Giving me a quick look over she said, "I might be inclined to put him up but what are you willing to stake against him?" "I win then he's mine. If you win then..." Luc waved his right hand around in the air a bit "... then he gets one of his wishes granted without all the - you know - usual attachments that come along with it." The lady in white thought about this for a short time before nodding, "Then its agreed. But no cheating or any of your usual tricks." "Yes, yes, yes. I will be on my best behavior." Waving a finger at Luc the lady added, "you break any of the rules and he gets his wish." I know he was wearing his sunglasses but I could swear that he was rolling his eyes at the lady. "Excellent. Then we have a deal and a game, shuffle away Michael." This was about the point I came to the realization of who was playing in front of me. I started dealing the game even though I was having a hard time with the cards, what with my soul on the line and all. They had both agreed to a no limit, heads up style game of holdem, each starting out with 1500 in chips. Once again the back on forwards of the previous game started up. Ever so slowly Luc was gaining a lead on the heavenly white figure to my left. At one stage my heart stopped when she went all in, to my relief Luc folded out that hand. I was a little nervous too, when Luc raised the lady in white with an all in of his own. She sat there for a long time looking at her cards as well as taking a long look into the bleak sunglasses of Luc. Finally she laid down the hand increasing Luc's lead considerably. I exhaled not realizing that I had been holding my breath. Slowly though the Lady in white made a steady come back until once again they were about even. After dealing out their hole cards for another hand there was suddenly a very serious tension in the air. Luc raised the ladies blind bet and she in turn called. I slowly dealt out the three flop cards, an eight of hearts, an ace of spades and finally a six of diamonds. Staring each other down Luc was quick to bet with the lady in white smiling at him the entire time. It was very obvious that this was most likely going to be the hand that decided my fate for the rest of eternity. I was starting to really hate the shirt I was wearing along with the bottle of water I had before coming to the table. Those two factors and the tense situation I was in really put a lot of pressure on my bladder. Crossing my legs under the table I dealt out the turn card, which was a jack of diamonds. Again Luc pushed out a decent portion of his stack. With little hesitation and the same wry smile on her face, the lady called. Another pause was needed to keep a hold of my bladder before I dealt out the final card, another six. Luc knocked the table, checking to his opponent who immediately announced, "All in,' before pushing her remaining stack of chips into the middle of the table. I groaned audibly at the obvious ploy. Luc looked at both of us with that damned (no pun intended) smile of his. "Well it looks like luck is on my side today, I call." Standing up Luc through his cards face up into the middle of the table, "four of a kind, sixes." Turning over her cards to show two eights, the lady announced. "Four of a kind, eights." Luc's face scrunched up, "Hang on one minute. You can't have four of a kind because there is only one... two eights." There was a slight pause on the table as Luc scratched his pure white hair, somehow managing not to move a single hair. I was looking at the same thing he was, the first card I had dealt out. What I had thought had been a six of diamonds was in actual fact an eight of diamonds. Immediately Luc turned on me. "You switched the card didn't you?" This wasn't good but all I could do was tell the truth. "Um why would I switch the card when I don't know what she was holding?" Scratching his head Luc looked a little confused, it was the way his sunglasses scrunched up at the middle, "Umm... well you see..." he paused for a moment. "Ah shit." Not entirely impressed Luc grabbed the rest of his chips and walked away from the table. The lady in white stood up and smiled once more. "Next time Lucy!" Luc stopped, clenched his fists for a second, mumbled something and then walked off. Looking to me the lady said, "well it seems you get to keep your soul." "Not to be ungrateful or anything but I get a wish too right?" "You already got it. Take a deep breath," she replied. Looking at her quizzically I did just that. To my surprise there was no strain around my waist. I now had a shirt that fitted like a glove and surprisingly that made my day. As the lady started to walk away I had to ask, "that was a six wasn't it?" The lady turned around and winked, "might have been." "I thought you weren't allowed to do that?" Walking away she replied, "How do you think good always triumphs over evil?" Ever since that game I have always tried to do a little good each day, that and I wouldn't curse next time I got a tight shirt. Complete Online Poker