MetaPrograms Accessing Cues
The credit for inspiring me and giving the idea to work on this
goes to Eric Robbie - in July 2005 in Mexico on Master Prac
course he only mentioned Meta Programs Accessing Cues and I
thought - WOW. It was sort of the feeling psychologists get when
they discover fast phobia cure - they go, "Hey!! We can do it in
five minutes instead of 10 years!!"
I definiately was not the biggest fan of Meta Programs - I knew
they were important, but recognizing them linguistically felt
like loss of time; I never found a trainer who congruently was
always able to utlize them. Then there was the idea that what is
more important than Meta Programs themselves is the sequence of
them - I thought that worked better, since never in my life did
I find anyone who would always have this particular MP or other
- too often they were used as as just another way of
categorizing people.
Let`s say there`s a polarised person and they will do just the
opposite to what you say and do. If you wanted to recognize this
Meta Program verbally - you would need more time and risk more.
You come up to the person, say: "I have this contract for you",
and what they do in their head is already against what you are
planning to achieve - it`s too late. What you were after was
saying: "Probably you wouldn`t be interested in this" - they do
the opposite, there you go. The question is - how would you know
what to say?
The idea of accessing Meta Programs non-verbally opened many
doors. First, you don`t need to ask - you just know before they
open their mouth. Second, I noticed a common misconception that
MP`s deal mainly with language - I believe they do, but my guess
it they are much more behavioural then linguistic. Think about
it - compare two people, one motivated towards, one motivated
away from. Think about the way they move when talk about their
goals. The way a procedure person gestures. The way a reactive
person looks at you.
The way I have been discovering all these basically comes down
to three stages - initially for a few weeks I would compare in
my head bahaviour, voice and looks of the people I know have
this or that MP. This would give me some idea how they differed.
This also lead me to good conclusions - obviously MP`s come in
different "sizes and shapes", but there were many coomon
features too. Then I would practise - assess MP`s of a person
before I started talking to them and later verbally check my
predictions. Finally - and this text is the result of this- on
my last Master Prac In Warsaw, Poland, I gave my students a
special task which took us two full days. Results were
astonishing and very creative.
I gave all them a sheet which looked the way you see it here:
REPEATED WORDS GRAMMAR STRUCTURES VOICE BODY GESTURES
FACE SUBMODALITIES INTERNAL DIALOGUE KINESTHETICS
OTHER
On a flipchart, so that everyone could see, I put a list of 15
most popular MP`s. It stayed there for a few days, during which
I would nest many stories, refer to them from time to time and
point in a humorous way to some bahaviours of my students in the
seminar which defined certain kind of MP. In other words, I was
preparing them for a few days so that they practically realised
what MP`s were about.
Then the day came and I handed them the sheets you can see
above. I diveded them in groups of three and gave each one a
task.
The first person was to "have" a certain MP. In other words I
believed you can tell someone to be for instance a proactive
type and they will. I gave them new temporary identities. And I
hoped that everything else - bahaviour, beliefs, intonation and
voice, vocabulary, the way of talking, maybe even some
reinterpratation of values - would follow; and my predictions
were right. Call someone a hunk no matter what they look like,
make them believe in it and there you go. It does work.
This proved also, though they didn`t realise that quickly, that
the way I did it presupposed that MP`s can be changed - if you
can have any given in an exercise and congruently "function"
with it, then obviously it teaches that you can choose which one
you want to have and when. The second person was the one
starting a conversation - we chose very simple stuff, like going
out together, planning which movie to see etc. - this part did
not matter.
The third person was to observe the two - not say a word, just
see, hear and feel.
After like 5-minute conversation I asked all them to quietly
fill the sheet with their observations. Notice - doing so I had
three different perspectives, since the first one was "me", the
second "you", and the third one "they". When they were done I
asked them to compare individual observations within the group
and notice what was similar. Then we would do the same with me
and compare what all groups had - notice similarities, agree
congruently in what was there and make conclusions. This article
is the result of what we did.
If you notice, I chose ten categories to focus on. Some of them
in certain situations did not prove to be useful - in others
they were crucial.
1. Repeated words obviously dealt with what they were saying.
For the purpose of the exercise which mainly did with non-verbal
part, words used were not so much important, and they were an
obvious consequence of other observations. You could even
predict what the person was going to say on the basis of other
things. But still, useful.
2. Grammar structures played important role in a few cases -
especially proactive/reactive MP`s. We also paid attention which
MP was more asking than stating or negating.
3. Voice was absolutely crucial - we focused on intonation,
speed, pace and other submodalities.
4. Body dealt with posistion, which quite often presupposed
internal mechanisms. Obviously if you get a person who sits
bending down, head down, shoulder slack, they are bahaviorally
proesupposed to make small pictures close to their heads - if
the floor blocked your way so would you!!
5. Gestures to me always helped to discover submodalities - they
would draw in front of my eyes, point where Internal Dialogue
was coming from or where things were. In this case this is also
true.
6. Face is made of more than 80 muscles working together - in
communication it reflects so much, that I am sure people
underestimate its rich meaning. Many times they would say
"there`s something in the face which tells me this..." etc.
without being able to precisely state what it was.
Interestingly, this took place here too.
7. Submodalities were mainly accessesed by Eric`s SMEAC`s - we
dealt with the most important things, like sizes, numbers,
shapes, colours, distance, leaving some less important aside.
Association and dissociation in many situations was crucial.
8. Internal dialogue was crucial - we treated it as basically
internal equivalent of external voice, just that ID wouldn`t be
heard on the outside and is definiately primary to external
voice. We paid special attention to intonation patterns and
content of what it said.
9. Kinesthetics is based on what the 1st, 2nd and 3rd person
were feeling. We described and categorized it ("relaxed",
"tense" etc.) rather than described submodalities
10. Other was the pot for anything else that came to our heads
The following is the description of our observations and
conclusions - by no means do I claim the list is exhaustive or
always works - what`s more, I`m absolutely positive there`s so
much more to discover and uncover that this is just a peak of an
iceberg. I chose things that worked for us, avoided mind reading
and speculating what "could be" there, just focused on what we
saw, heard and felt without interpreting it. E-mail me
(info@mateuszgrzesiak.com) with your ideas and feedback, Meta
Programs Accessing Cues is a fantastic thing to work on and it
can move us much forward in our learnings and teachings.
1. Proactive and reactive MP
- Active type is a leader - he chooses most of the decisions
himself, often basis on internal standards and authority. He
uses first person singular ("I") or plural ("We"). His sentences
are semantically well-formed with absolutely characteristic use
of active voice. He speaks fluently, confidently, specifically.
Body position suggests self-confidence, he plants himself often,
head and shoulders straight up. Deep breathing. Makes big, often
panoramic pictures, 3D, vety often associated - this influences
his kinesthetics, because Active`s are the type who gesture,
move, switch their position often. He leads more than paces.
Little or no internal dialogue, if so - hardly ever anything
verbalised, rather silent subconscious intonation patterns like
- "mmmmmmmm", which strenghten his state and power of
persuasion. His chunks up rather than down and moves to options
rather than procedures.
- Reactive type avoids responsibility and is more prone to feel
guilty. He basis on external standards and authority. Wants
decisions to be made instead of making them. Crucial use of
passive voice - "it has to be done", "it must", "one should".
Asks many questions (rather than states statements) , because
prefares when the answers come from different sources than
himself. Interestingly, when he is asked to perform or decide,
often he will go into "don`t want to" or "confused what to do"
states. Uses obligation ("must", "have to") and necessity
("should"), which automatically makes him motivated in away from
manner. A lot of internal dialogue searching content-wise for
answers and installing doubt. Many small pictures without
specific content, often blurred, moving around. Dissociates
himself, which makes sense with his behaviour - he sees himself
in situations as marionette and subject of decisions rather than
source of them. "Placetor" in Satir categories - pleads,
apologises, takes guilt, is sorry. He might be tense often, face
expresses anticipation.
2. Motivation towards and away from
- Motivated towards are easy to spot - they state things in
positive and avoid nagation. The crucial point is that they like
the things they "want", not "should" or "must". This difference
is very important - motivated towards chooses a corrot and
dislikes the stick. His voice is often excited, more relaxed and
confident. He can "turn on" like madcap, shows his emotions,
experiences externally, enjoys more. In non-NLP language he`s an
optimist, what is obviously connected with "positive"
submodalities he`s making - tons of pleasant colors and a lot of
brightness. The bigger the size of the picture, the more "turned
on" they will be. They "have no time" for ID, if it`s there in
hardly ever verbalized, rather goes into intonation patterns
which enrich their states. A lot of eye movements going in
different directions, often jumping from a picture to picture or
seeing a big, panoramic one. A lot of gestures, used to desribe
and emphasise submodalities. They smile a lot - thinking about
nice feeling they will have which comes from the picture they
make simply makes them feel good. A loop is created - picture
makes them feel good, kinesthetic reaction is evoked, which
makes the submodalities more intense, which influences
kinestehtics and so on.
- Motivated away from - this type avoids bad experiences. Often
they use obligation ("have to" and "must"). Sentences are well
chosen and thought over; logical, rational computer. Often they
give reasons why. Pictures are dark compared with towards
motivation and dominated by black, grey, dark green, blue
colours (they will even say this verbally, like " I have dark
thought about this). These are rather movies, usually with
unpleasant ending. Doesn`t smile too much. Face is darker,
greyish, after years with more wrinkles and lips curling down.
They use "what if" very often and polarise to what people say.
The emotion which they get when halucinated evil doesn`t happen
is only a relief - which is an example of stick motivation. They
explain themselves with "I want to avoid the worst" when calles
pessimists. A lot of ID with horrible intonation.
Characteristic, when they walk or move they often lose rhythm
and fluency - I believe it`s due to internal incongruence (he
rushes to work to avoid his boss scolding him, which makes him
feel bad and it influences his "flow"). I believe - and it is my
guess - that these people die from heart attacks more than
anyone else. Funny, I also think there are more men motivated
away from than women. Voice is often sad, disappointed, worried.
3. Internal and external standards
- Internal standards and authority - he believes his assessments
and judgements more than the others. Often polarised to what the
others say, especially if concerns himself to have authority on
the topic. Confident voice, often with a manner. Words like
"me", "I" appear in different variants. Easy to manipulate by
giving compliments and confirming he`s right. Once I watched a
cartoon - Johnny Bravo it was - and Johnny was picking up a
girl. After talking about himself for long, finally he goes -
"But dear, let`s not talk about me, let`s talk about you! So,
what do you think of me?" Body is straighten up, focused on his
speakers, he loves argumenting. Firm body position, planted.
Gestures used to emphasise he`s right, like for example pointing
to himself, open hand moving in the air, a fist. Makes many
pictures in frames, contrasted and content-specific. Often
associated. ID is usually only his. Kinesthetics often based on
self-control and confidence. Paradoxally, he sometimes needs to
know opinions of others. Uses active voice.
- External standards and authority - looks for external
confirmation. Makes small and distanced pictures of what he
thinks and bigger and closer of the others. Many pictures flow
around his head, sometimes without any content, which may
confuse him. They can be often one of many sources of
information. A lot of ID of external origin, i.e. he hears other
people talking in his head with authoritative or authoritarian
intonation. He loses rhythm while talking to others, because
tries to do both things at a time - be up-time and talk to you
and in-time listening to ID. Uses external reference like "they
said". Might be reactive. Less focused on the speaker, trances
out often, his faces expresses conentration, reflexion or
looking for something. He quotes a lot.
I couldn`t publish everything - too long it is.
There`s more if you click here:
http://www.nlppolska.pl/forum/viewtopic.php?t=52
Enjoy and contact if you have some ideas.