On Human Social Behavior
I call it the "Centre of the World Syndrome", and almost
everyone has it to some degree. For many of us it does little to
effect the world and the people around us. For others it is a
constant hindrance and in most situations the sufferer and those
around him/her are completely unaware of the problem. Often this
syndrome can be mistaken for low intelligence, or deliberate
selfishness. It is none of these things, in most cases it is
brought on by fear, and low self-confidence. I will argue that
CWS exists by arguing; what it is, where it came from, and why
some don't progress beyond it. I will also demonstrate what the
negative effects CWS brings to society.
People can only see one perspective at a time, as such; it is
difficult to understand that others have a different opinion.
Since we cannot jump into another brain to see how they have
come up with their thoughts, we are stuck trying to understand
them from our own perspective. How can a man for example have
any idea what it is like to be a woman and vice versa, or how
can a rich man know what it's like to be homeless and vice
versa. Some of us try to understand what it is like for others,
and those of us who do not even try, or even contemplate trying
have CWS.
The differences between us do not have to be so drastic, really
we have no idea how anyone else thinks. We have to assume it is
at least similar to own our experiences, yet time and time again
people have different opinions. Even if two people experience an
event together, they may have different opinions about it. Those
of us who refuse to accept that another's opinion is equal point
have CWS. Often times we assume the other is simply mistaken, or
possibly we ourselves are mistaken, but there need not be a
mistake for two people to disagree. It's called perspective and
those with CWS do not understand how there can be more than one
perspective.
Life is a series of realizations. Most of these realizations are
taught to us, it's the nature of our species, and many others,
to pass down already acquired information. Each new generation
can pick up where the last left off. We do not need to learn
irrigation, or establish laws, we change them as necessary
because the fundamentals are already there for us. Social
behavior is very similar. Human beings each come to their own
realizations, parents will show their children the existence of
God from their point of view and the child will accept it
without hesitation. When the child is older they will question
those beliefs and choose for themselves what they want to
believe in.
Previous to this choice children do not contemplate what God is,
they believe blindly. After that choice they have either
realized that God actually does exist or they realize that their
parents were wrong. This can also lead immediately to the
realization that his/her parents do not know everything there is
to know, although most of us come to that particular realization
first. That we all think differently is a difficult realization,
not only to make, but also to understand. As babies we are
completely dependent on those around us, other peoples concern
for out well-being is critical to our survival.
This impedes the process of the realization that we are not the
centre of the world, because for a long time we are the centre
of the world, at least we're the centre of the world that we
know. A child, who has never left his home for any reason, does
not know or care anything for the world beyond the front door.
To them the world consists of nothing but the house they live
in. Since they are too young to do much for themselves, the
design of the house, and the family around them concerns
themselves with the baby first. To the baby everything revolves
around them.
This was evident on a global scale during the time that mankind
thought the sun and the cosmos rotated around the Earth. You
could say the entire race had a case of "Centre of the Universe
Syndrome". As a child grows parents strive to teach their
children, commonly unknowingly, that they are not the centre of
the world, that they are just one part of it. This is done by
not allowing your child to get everything that they want.
Parents who spoil their children will hinder their child's
chances of expanding themselves beyond the CWS.
There are other reasons for an adult to have CWS other than poor
upbringing, perhaps the person is question is simply selfish, or
as I stated above, perhaps they are afraid. Selfish people will
reject the idea that others may have valid opinions because then
they may need to face that they are wrong. The underlying cause
for this is fear. We fear that others will look at us in a
negative light, we fear that others will not like us.
If we do not possess enough self-confidence we cannot accept
another's point of view, this leads to close-mindedness. If a
person outright rejects everything that is contrary to what they
believe because they cannot comprehend what the other point of
view is, it can be very damaging to society. It will lead to
racism, sexism, and other forms of bigotry. I will use the
example of racism in the United States. When the country was
young its people used the black man for slave labour. The people
of the time were wrong to do that, they were taking advantage of
a people that they could take advantage of.
Similar injustices have happened throughout human history, it
seems to be our nature. It is rational for a man of that time to
look down upon his slaves, they work for him, and he is legally
allowed to do just about anything to them. Society supports his
racism. It doesn't make it right, but it makes it
understandable, how many of us can say we only do the right
thing no matter what we're allowed to do, or what we can get
away with? (I would also bring up the point that we do not know
what society was like during those times from a first person
point of view. We cannot base their decisions on what we
consider right in our current time, and to do so would suggest
an instance of CWS.)
The problem arises as these slave owners family lines progress
through time. Today there are no slaves and we all should know
full well that all humans are equal. I have never been given
good reason to think otherwise, yet still there is racism in the
United States. This racism is handed down generation after
generation, and the young of these families are taught that the
black man is not their equal. They are taught this in much the
same way they would be taught that God exists. Both these
examples are good examples of beliefs that are difficult to
break away from. Racism specifically is a good example because
it is believed world wide to be wrong. Why are people still
racist then?
Imagine someone telling you that spending time with your family
is wrong and should never be done or even considered. You would
laugh and walk away from whomever made that claim. Now imagine
the majority of the world agreed with that person, you would be
quite confused. You want to be your own person, make your own
decision, so you decide to reject the world's point of view.
This is essentially what a person with CWS would do. They think
they are making their own decision; however, they are making the
decision that requires the least self-evaluation, they are
making the decision that has been taught to them by others
because it is easier. They are afraid that they may actually be
what the world looks at them as, and it is easier for them to
reject that and live their lives in denial. They have
effectively closed their minds to the opinions of others and are
a full-blown case of CWS.
CWS does not need to be as extreme as I have outlined so far.
Most people have it to some degree. For many if us it does not
impede our lives, or the lives of those around us at all, for
others it is a huge factor, and for still others it is a daily
factor, but not a significant one. Someone who does little
things for example, they may not call friends or family, but
they still get angry when others reciprocate the same insulting
act. They cannot understand how another might feel, even though
they've felt the exact same way. Usually some time would have
passed between the two events (the selfish act committed against
another, and the same act reversed) so they are incapable of
putting the two together. If the two events occur in a small
time frame this may be a trigger to the CWS sufferer to realize
that they were wrong and that will help them to overcome the
syndrome. Part of the reason so many people suffer from CWS is
that few people know of its existence, and make no strives to
break someone else free of it. We may think of them as stupid or
selfish instead.
If we had the ability to see into another persons mind,
telepathy, or even to see, out of another's eyes, our own
actions for one evening, this syndrome may not even exist. For
now we are stuck in our own bodies, our own minds. It is a
struggle for every one of us to believe that we are just a
single part of the world and not the most important part of it.
To each one of us we are the most important part of the world,
we just have to realize that to others we are not the most
important, nor should we be; we are just another factor in their
lives.