Women like it on top.....of the scoreboard that is.

Since this fantasy season has begun I have been noticing things that have never caught my attention before. Well, maybe they did...subconsciously. But, now I have decided to bring them to the surface for all to know. There appears to be certain things that occur when men know that a woman is in their fantasy league. (I should not have to go into detail with examples. You men know what you do.) Why is that? Are the men intimidated? Afraid to get beat by a girl? Or is having a sports-loving, beer-drinking, good-looking woman in the league a turn-on? Hmmm...... Maybe all the above? Ok - first of all, no one is that great of a fantasy football player. We all have strokes of luck and strokes of flub. That is just the way the game works. Some of the best players can get injured at any given time and a player that went undrafted in most leagues can end up being a top-tier player at the end of the season. The key to winning fantasy football is to keep current with all the news, injuries, updates, etc. and to use the damn waiver wire!...oh yeah, and having a whole lot of luck doesn't hurt either. Now that I have that out of the way, I guess it is safe to say at this point it is quite certain that men and women both have an equal chance of winning their respective leagues as long as they know what they are doing. But, who knows how to do it better and why? That's the key question. We all know that there are significant differences between men and women, right? Of course! So, I began to think: maybe it is these key differences that give women the edge when it comes to fantasy football. Maybe I should explain myself.... 1. Details, details, details! Any women can tell you just about anything about their children. I mean come on, she knows the date and times of doctors appointments that are six weeks away, last years romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams. This is what we are good at fellas! Now, on the other hand, a man is vaguely aware of some short people living in their house. Because of this astute attention to detail, we remember such minute things as this being the same day three years ago Joe Blow's mother passed away and we should take that fact into consideration when picking our starting line-up as he will probably be in a sullen mood. Still with me? Here's another example. 2. Shop 'til we drop! There probably isn't a woman in the world that doesn't like to shop. To shop (and shop well) requires patience, time-management and a whole lot of stamina. Women can go an entire day forgoing food and water when shopping is involved. This attribute can help us in everything from preparing our cheat sheets for the draft to waking up at dawn on Sunday mornings to check the injury reports. 3. Outlook on Marriage. We have all read the popular saying: "A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change and she does." Guys! Wake up! This is how you view your fantasy players as well. You hope and pray that they won't change but, inevitably, they do. All I hear from men is "Never bench a stud!" I'm calling the BS flag on that one. Has Peyton Manning really been that much of a stud this year? I can think of a couple times that I would have benched him for his brother. But, maybe that's just my womanly instinct talking. 4. Strive for a bargain! I have memories of sitting with my mom cutting out measly little thirty cent coupons from the Sunday paper. Anything to save a few bucks, right? Well, in fantasy football trading the same concept applies. Trading can be one of the most lucrative opportunities that a fantasy football owner has. One trade can make or break your team. No one can argue with that. Because of this innate need to conserve, women will take the stamina we learned from shopping and our immeasurable attention to detail to work out the best trade possible. And the most undisputed reason that gives women an edge at fantasy football: 5. Sex is a weapon. Like it or not, boys, the mere fact that I am a sexy woman who loves football drives you crazy. I have received countless Instant Messages and emails from men that have NOTHING to do with football. And all these men have been members of the same forums as I. It must be in your jeans, err, I mean genes. I am not telling you this because I do not like it. I mean, come on, what woman doesn't like attention? What I am saying though is - BEWARE - I will use this against you to work out trades, to find out your next strategy and anything else I might deem useful. Sorry to break it to you like that but, I am a woman and we are all conniving to some degree. There are countless other attributes that we women have that I could include in this list. But, I think you all have suffered enough.