When trying to get something accomplished, assertive behavior is the most effective. Although other methods may accomplish the intended ends, the alternatives imperil our own rights or those of others, creating conflict and building mistrust into relationships. One of the keys to effectiveness is learning how to communicate thoughts and feelings without jeopardizing yourself or others, and this ability elevates both morale and productivity in the workplace.

Distinguish for yourself what is submissive, assertive, and aggressive behavior in different situations. Consider your non-verbal behavior as well. Pick a situation and imagine how you usually handle it. Write down your usual responses in posture, eye contact, voice, tone, facial expression, and physical contact.

Now, pinpoint your own blocks to assertiveness: fear of disapproval, need to please others, fear of being too masculine or feminine, or the dread of making mistakes.

Visualize yourself dealing effectively with a problem situation by considering alternative responses. Do not act hastily or in anger