Your Online Dating profile - how to present yourself online
Your Online Dating profile - how to present yourself online
For many people, the hardest part of starting to date online is
figuring out what to put in their profile. All dating sites
offer their members a profile page, where each member can write
about his or herself, upload a photo (or several) etc. What you
write about yourself in the profile is extremely important:
second only to the picture in terms of making other members
aware of who you are and making them want to contact you.
Many people are keen to start searching for and contacting
people as soon as they join a site. As a result, they either
leave their profile blank, or write something quickly before
beginning their search. This is OK if you're just having a look
around, but if you are serious about finding love online, you
should take some time and make sure your profile is a good
reflection of who you are. After all, it's what makes you stand
out from the rest of the people on the site.
Here are a few points to keep in mind:
Not too long, not too short
Try to write a profile that is detailed enough to tell people
about you, but short enough to leave people wanting more.
Writing a full length essay is a waste of time as most people
wouldn't bother reading it all. If someone did read it through
and contacted you, you probably wouldn't have anything left to
talk about!
Be yourself
It's easy to lie when writing a profile, but more difficult to
follow through once you meet someone. If your profile says
you're 6'4" when you're really 5'11", your cover will be blown
as soon as you turn up for your date. Also, starting a
relationship with a lie is a sure way to get off to a bad start.
Unfortunately, even people who are honest and well-meaning
sometimes lie unintentionally in their profile, by trying to
write it in a way that they think would make them more
attractive to other people. If you want to attract a likeminded
person, you have to be honest about who you are, your hobbies
and interests etc.
Don't be too demanding
Many people use their profiles to list the qualities they would
like their ideal match to have. There is nothing wrong with
that, but make sure you balance this with information about
yourself. You don't want to come across as writing a ransom note.
Too much information
Avoid mentioning past disappointments and bad break-ups in your
profile; this is not what the space is for. Think: do you really
want this to be the first thing people see when they look you
up? Don't let yourself be defined by negative aspects of your
personality and bad experiences of the past.
Make it funny
Using humour is a good way to liven up a profile and give people
a glimpse into your personality. Some of the most successful
profiles are the ones that simply make people laugh. Including a
joke you find funny is good, as long as you make sure you write
something about yourself in the profile as well.
Be original
Anyone can write "I have a good sense of humour", but not anyone
could make you laugh. When writing about yourself, don't just
use a list of adjectives. Try to go deeper and give people
examples of what you actually mean. A good way of doing this is
starting off with a list of adjectives and then using each one
as a starting point for a few lines of text.
Upload a picture
Even the least shallow people want to know who they're talking
to. Not having a photo on your profile will make many people
ignore you completely. Some people even specify in their search
that they only want to speak to people whose picture appears on
the site. Don't worry about your looks. Different people have
different tastes and not everyone expects to meet a movie star
or a supermodel online. A clear headshot of you smiling is all
it takes to seriously increase the amount of responses you get.
Be consistent
Make sure your profile, your screen name and your picture all
match the impression you want to give. If you are a woman
looking for a serious relationship, calling yourself "SexKitten"
and uploading a semi-nude picture of yourself, is not likely to
attract the kind of man you're looking for. A man looking for a
wife, should probably not use a username that hints about how
good he is in bed.
Remember: your profile is the first (and often last) impression
you will make to potential online matches. Make it count.