GOING BONKERS WITH BAUBLES, BERRIES & BELLS

Copyright The Quipping Queen 2005.

GOING BONKERS WITH BAUBLES, BERRIES & BELLS
--Or, Beware of BlackBerries, Cellphones and Laptops!--

If state-of-the-art "wireless technology" has given birth to such tawdry taskmasters as BlackBerries, cellphones and laptops, the Universe has also seen to it that such man-made devices would come packaged with an invisible, immutable, and infernal operating system deity named, "Calamity, Chaos & Confusion".

It seems that happiness today has been reduced to acquiring newfangled gadgets, gizmos or gigagobblers that do absolutely everything but clean the kitchen sink.

Speaking of scruffy sculleries, your best bet would be to a visit your local "Tabernacle of Tetrachloride" where you can request a private audience with the "Wizard of Washbasins". Failing that, consult the "Diva of Drudgery"* (who usually has all the quick and dirty answers to the western world's most innocuous conundrums!)

Sadly, my days as a professional cherry-picker in Peach Bottom, Virginia are over ...which brings me in a round about way to my favorite comfort food ..."passion fruit". Besides consuming far too many succulent seeds and passion pits for my own good, I also enjoy the occasional shopping-spree for trendy