How ADD Affects Families
Typically, there is a lot of blame and frustration associated
with Attention Deficit Disorder. Depending on how long the
problem has gone before being diagnosed, there may be serious
mental and emotional scars as family members and the child dealt
with issues associated with ADD. This disorder is not only
difficult for parents, but also the child with ADD and other
siblings in the family.
The obvious victim of ADD is the child it affects. Being
accustomed to negativity, these children usually suffer from
very low self-esteem. Although they want to behave well, they
have impulsive actions that typically result in constant
punishment. Parents and teachers of an ADD child often are not
aware or do not accept that the child suffers from a disorder
and they are not always acting on a conscience level. The child,
after being reprimanded and not being able to control their
actions, is left feeling as though they will never be adequate
or meet everyone else's expectations.
The parents of an ADD child suffer from incredible frustration
and doubt of their parenting skills. Often ridiculed by
teachers, family members, and other acquaintances, they are
often viewed as being the cause of their child's behavior, as
though lack of discipline is the root cause of their child's
actions. Attention Deficit Disorder sometimes places a strain on
the parents' marital relationship as well, as parents blame each
other for being overly lenient or harsh in their rearing habits.
This can lead to many arguments and disagreements that prove to
be difficult on spouses.
An often forgotten casualty of Attention Deficit Disorder is the
siblings of a child with ADD. Often not apparent, siblings in
this situation often experience similar frustration and anxiety
as the parents and child with ADD. Jealously sometimes plays a
factor in their feelings as their sibling requires so much more
attention, even if it is negative in nature. Also, these
children often get the brunt of their sibling's impulsive
actions, including aggressive behavior typical of ADD. These
children may also find themselves being categorized in school
and other social environments because of their sibling's
behavior, which can also have a negative connotation.
In addition to immediate family, grandparents, aunts, uncles,
and cousins may also be affected when a child has ADD. Depending
on the closeness of the family, behavior outbursts and
discipline issues may be a factor dealt with on various levels.
In extreme cases, ADD may actually cause some familial
relationships to be severed.