Some Technical Treason and six ways to speed up your P.C..

Some Technical Treason.

Six ways to effectively speed up your P.C.

1.Place it on Jet, as close as possible to the front.
2.Increase your ram by putting him on growth hormones. Fasten your P.C. onto your enhanced ram, taking care not to hinder or compromise his circulation. Then whip him with a U.S.B. hub, at the end of two metres of cable.
3.Now this is a beauty! Give it maximum acceleration with an aircraft carrier "elastic thing"!
4.Swith your P.C. "on".
5.Take the aforementioned Jet for a spin.

Now, shoud your P.C. be too fast, replace it with yourself and repeat steps 1,2,3, and step two, again.

I hope that this technical insight was helpful.

P.S. You may need to get special permission from the I.S.P.C.A., or relevant Aviation authority, regarding the use of their "elastic". Use your own discretion and due diligence!

P.P.S. My esteemed Editor, recommended that I call this "six" steps, even though I could only think of five. He insisted that "Six" rolls better from the tongue, or technically, that sliver of meat that he cleans out my ear with.

Tranni D'Electric.

About the Author

Tranni D'Electric is an "expert columnist" on electronics and consumer products, at The Trivial Times