Self Sabotage
Self-Sabotage
Self sabotage is something we do to ourselves when we feel we
don't deserve good things to happen to or for us. There is no
logical explanation for why we don't or won't allow such things
to happen. This is not for lack of desire for good things,
rather, it's like a tug of war we play with ourselves inside
between us wanting something good and not feeling worthy of it.
Frequently using the word should is an excellent indication that
one may be experiencing self sabotaging behaviors.
If there is no real reason for one to not experience good
things, then self sabotage is present.
Self sabotage can be a minor thing- a phase- or it can become so
serious that it limits or completely destroys one's ability or
desire to live the happy and fulfilling life we are all entitled
to the moment we are born.
Unfortunately, circumstances in life can severely alter our
self-image to the point where we feel trapped in a never-ending
cycle of unhappiness and lack of self esteem and self worth.
Here are some symptoms of self sabotage- I've used the 15 most
common symptoms that I see both in my own self and predominately
in others, most of which are done sub-consciously:
Procrastination
Destroying good or working relationships
Dissatisfaction with home life, career, relationships and life
in general
Inability to control anger
Seeking out or staying in abusive relationships
Always putting one's self down, self doubt, belittlement of
self ("I'm not worth their time" or- "They shouldn't be doing
this for me because I don't deserve it". or- "I'm just in the
way!".)
Trust issues
Depression
Inability to finish what is started
Always having to have a "crisis" in life to feel purpose, or
needing drama to feel fulfilled
Addictive behavior- broad spectrum
What do others think of me? Or- How do others see me?
Weight loss with equal or more gain afterwards
Worrying excessively
Jeopardizing what is already good or working in life such as
relationships, jobs, etc.
How to change:
First and foremost, one needs to be completely and sincerely
honest with their self. To not be is also a form of self
sabotage because one cannot address their issues if one
continues to run and hide from what is holding them back!
How much are you willing to do to work on yourself?
What are your goals?
Find out what you want, name your goals, make a plan to achieve
those goals and then work hard to stick to those goals.
AFFIRM AFFIRM AFFIRM!!! Affirmations sound silly and corny but
they're actually an excellent way to undo one's past way of
believing they are not "worthy". How? Simply state the good
things about yourself- daily and frequently.
All people are born worthy and good. Some people throughout
their lives are told they are not good, they're not worth it,
they're useless and the etc. In time, they believe it.
Undo that damage. You believed those people- or yourself- when
they told you those things, right? It's time to believe yourself
when you are affirming the good things about yourself.
Each day, find five good things about yourself. Make a list, and
make that list your personal bible. Carry it with you
everywhere. State those affirmations. Add to the list
constantly, without erasing the past affirmations.
In time, provided you were honest with yourself, you will begin
to believe that yes! you are a good and worthy person who is
deserving of happiness and success!
Everyone has good- even people who are seemingly evil. How we
choose to use our gifts is up to us.
And remember! Honesty to self is an all important first step.
Yes, the truth hurts. The truth really does set us free from
what is holding us back, and what usually holds us back is
ourselves.
Break free from the binds of your past.
And remember too- as someone once said:
The best revenge is to live well