Affairs must be in the air.Affairs seem to be everywhere.

I know I have seen many accounts of them in my office in the last few months. One of the observations I have made is that every single one of us is vulnerable.

A popular myth is that an affair always ends the marriage.

While some marriages do end when there is an affair, the reality is that any couple can survive and grow past an affair, if they are committed to doing at least a few things:

1. The affair must end; the person who had the affair must cut ties to the person who was part of the affair.

2. The other spouse has to deal with the sense of anger, betrayal and the other ugly emotions that come with this territory.

3. The spouse who had the affair must genuinely apologize for the harm caused.

4. Trust has to be rebuilt.

5. Both spouses need to look honestly at how this could happen, and look honestly at their contributions in the affair.

I've taken some flack for the following statement, but both spouses have an equally difficult road ahead.

If you do the necessary things to recover, the relationship can very well grow to be better than before.

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