Too Busy for Intimacy?
This day and age it has become normal for both husband and wife
to work full time jobs. With the additions of taking care of the
family and hectic schedule it is no wonder why many couples with
relationship problems are caught saying that they are just too
busy for sex. The more and more hectic a schedule becomes, the
further and further down the list intimacy gets pushed. But is
this completely necessary? Can a lack of intimacy be fully
blamed on the word "busy"?
After talking with hundreds of men and women, no matter how busy
their schedules had become there are certain events that inhabit
their schedules that could be easily interchanged for times of
intimacy. Often there becomes a strict division of time. Each
member of the relationship will divide their schedule and
consider it almost as an individual burden or something simply
not shareable. Because of this, some couples still manage to
schedule intimacy but find the intimacy lacking due to the
division of the task.
Using the words "too busy" often becomes a cover. It becomes an
excuse for things that we don't want to do in every day life,
but can't stand to be honest about. There are usually underlying
relationship problems that cause the lack of intimacy. It
becomes so easy to blame these problems on errands, meetings, or
daily imperfections. Living day-to-day and suppressing anxieties
and resentments become unhealthily normal.
It is most important to learn that this situation is not about
blaming anyone. Intimacy by definition involves more than one
person. Say you haven't had sex in 10 weeks, and this breaks you
down so much that you conclude because of your breakdown that it
could not possibly be your fault. You then put the blame on your
partner that is "too busy". But just sit back and think. What is
it in your day you could trade to create time? Be the first to
make time. Your partner will follow, discard all insecurities
and feel confident. Remember your partner loves you mind, body
and soul.
There is always time for intimacy. Intimacy comes hand in hand
with honesty. The quicker you become honest with yourself, the
quicker the time will become available on your schedule. And
with a newfound confidence and passion, your partner's schedule
will become free as well.