Timely Counseling can Save your Marriage
The sad fact is that far too many people wait too long before
going for marriage counseling. Counseling has the potential to
save marriages, by providing a space in which couples can
explore their sources of conflict and arrive at a new
understanding of their relationship and each other.
Unfortunately, many people tend to hesitate before going into
counseling. For some, counseling may even seem like an admission
of failure. That's truly unfortunate, because it's far from
true, but that perception can be very influential.
Timely counseling can save your marriage - if both partners are
commited to the marriage and to the counseling process. The time
to seek it out is not after the damage has been done, and your
marriage and home environment are becoming contentious and
inhospitable. Rather, the time to take this step is as soon as
you notice that issues are coming up for you, or communication
is breaking down. As mentioned before, for counseling or therapy
to be helpful, both partners must be absolutely commited to the
process. They must be willing to participate fully, with the
intention of improving and saving the marriage. If one partner
has already detatched himself, mentally or psychologically, the
counseling process willb e useless. At that point, individual
counseling is usually what is needed, and the chances fo saving
the marriage are slimmer.
Of course, there are other actions you can take to save your
marriage. Some couples are able to do this themselves, without
outside help. Others get through difficult times with the help
of family and friends. Some marriages are even helped by
individual therapy - not just to help you separate if needed,
but to allow you to enter the marriage more fully. For example,
sometimes your experiences in a previous relationship can carry
over into your present one, or a traumatic event from the past
can affect the way you function today. Your marriage might be
bearing the strain of these past events. Having the courage to
face these issues might be what is needed to save your marriage.
Ultimately, it comes down to your (and your partner's) level of
commitment to the marriage. If both partners are fully commited,
they will do anything that is needed to make the marriage work.
Usually, that means they will be successful. Most marriages can
be saved, and nowadays, we have plenty of resources open to us
to help us do so.