Marriage Advice your Mother Never Gave You!
Have you heard it said that it takes a village to raise a child?
It doesn't stop there. Much of the wisdom that we get throughout
life comes from our village - our group of contacts, friends and
mentors, that we trust. In the olden days, marriage advice for
young couples would come from parents and grandparents, most of
whom would have had longstanding, successful marriages
themselves. They were eminently qualified to give marriage
advice, and the advice they gave was well taken and utilized. Of
course, not every marriage was successful, even back then - but
most people agree that marriages had a better chance a few
generations ago.
Nowadays, it may be up to us to compile our own marriage advice
from various friends, family members, professionals and books.
The good news is that there's plenty of advice out there, and
much of it is good. At the same time, it might also be time to
question some of the traditional marriage advice that we've all
heard at one time or another. For example, your mother or
grandmother might have told you that you should never go to bed
angry. The principle is sound - we shouldn't hold grudges or
hold onto anger. But taking this advice too literally may
backfire too; problems can look more serious when you're tired.
Sometimes going to bed - even if you're still angry - might be
just what you need to regain perspective.
Here's a great piece of marriage advice, though - take time out
for each other, just to be together and communicate, no matter
how busy life gets. This investment in your relationship will
pay off a thousandfold over the years. One of the big problems
that couples experience is that they lose the ability to
communicate with one another. They might even feel like they
have lost interest in each other and in the relationship, if
communication is poor.
The best marriage advice is all like that - not necessarily easy
to follow, but something you can work at over the years.
Marriage can be hard work, but you generally get out of it what
you put in. And if we can build solid marriages, we might be
well on our way to reviving the 'villages' of the past - strong,
solid communities that may be a source of traditional wisdom.