The mystery that is God

God is a complete mystery to me and I personally think that's just the way it's supposed to be. Anybody purporting to "know" what God is and understand God is a little wacko in my opinion. I have never met anyone with a direct pipeline to God, though I have met a few that claimed a direct pipeline to God. I watch some religious programs and like some of them and blow others off as nonsense. God as I understand "him" or "her" or "it" is free and open to anyone and everyone that seeks God. I personally believe God is a "him" and that's just my belief, I don't care or worry what others believe, it's personal and everyone can believe what they want. One thing I have learned about God is that I don't actually have to "believe", I just have to want to "believe"and he will do the rest. Weird but it works. God is not about rules, mankind is about rules. Mankind has made lot's of rules for everyone to follow. Isn't it funny though how those that make the rules in most cases don't follow the rules, rules are always for others and not for those that make them. Rules are meant to be broken, perfection is only an ideal I can strive for but never attain, by the same token I must forgive others for falling short, I do it all the time. I can be a very unforgiving person and hold a grudge for a long time but at the same time be totally bewildered when someone does the same to me....such is the human condition....locked in my own little world where I am the centre and the king....it's lonely at the top. I am getting better now though, I'll always fall short and I know that, but I don't hate like I used to or stay angry as long....progress rather than perfection. I just try to forgive, my God forgives me and it's something I will work on the rest of my life.