Who Buys from Recorded Telephone Sales Pitches?
Since we now tell annoying telemarketers to remove us from their
call lists, they don't call as often. They have devised a new
way to penetrate our household with recorded solicitations. You
can still get yourself removed from the list by requesting it.
But you have to listen to their entire message before you are
offered the option of being removed from the list to receive
future solicitation calls. A friend who listened to one of these
messages from start to finish told me that you have such option
at the end of the recorded message. I don't know if it is true,
because I always disconnect these calls within five seconds of
saying hello. I wonder how long it took for sleazy marketing
mavens to come up with the recorded sales pitch? Previously you
could yell your demand to be taking off their list and smash a
cymbal in to their eardrum before slamming the phone on them. It
is not quite the same when you are telling a recording where to
However, sometimes I do scream at automated voice prompts when I
call up businesses. For example, "Please state why you are
calling in one sentence." I wonder if businesses record that
part of the call? I hope not.
The list I would like to have is the one containing the names of
the consumers who first listen to these canned speeches and then
buy something. On numerous levels this would be a great list to
own for intelligence purposes. Would you want one of these
persons to watch your kids--or even your pets? Would you hire
one of these persons for a high-level job? Would you feel
comfortable if you knew your doctor was someone who would buy
something from a recorded sales pitch? Obviously I default to
classifying anyone who would fall for these tawdry tactics to be
foolish. But what frightens me most may prompt a pause-and-think
Why would such sales tactics continue to be used if nobody was
buying into it? You would think that if everyone got annoyed and
hung up the phone on these jokers that soon enough they would
just stop doing it. Companies would not continue to waste money
doing something that doesn't work. Since good customer service
from a company with no competition is a waste of time, big
companies today don't bother with it.
So, it is more than likely that someone you know and, perhaps,
even depend upon, can be sold something in this manner. And that
is a damn scary thought isn't it?
I am willing to grant leeway to victims of the
old-telephone-soliciting ways when it was one person, albeit an
oily salesperson, talking to another person. Maybe the buyer was
lonely. Perhaps the solicitor was charming or had the mannerisms
of a sex-line operator. Maybe the buyer was lonely and elderly
or horny and gullible. Such a buyer could have been drunk or
stoned out of their skull and just got taken for a ride. But
what excuses can be offered for people who buy stuff from a
recorded, telephone sales pitch? Even if they had a remote
interest in the product or service for sale, why would they buy
from a recorded message, or return a phone call to a company
after listening to a canned presentation?
Saying these people are stupid is mean. But presuming they are
intelligent may not be too wise either. Maybe I need to listen
to a couple of these recorded sales pitches all the way through
before summarily passing judgment. The ones I receive tell me
that l won something, but I still need to put up money to obtain
what I won. They also tell me that I am saving money by buying
something I have no used for; something I didn't care about
before they called. Maybe something else is in this mix that
folks who cursorily disconnect or curse while hanging up are
missing out on?
Are these the same people who also respond to emails indicating
that they won something and all they need to do is "click here
and provide your full name, bank account number, social security
number, address, and phone number to collect"?
I don't know exactly what I would do if I had that list of
people who buy stuff that way. But I would not mind having it
anyway. How about you?