The Irresistible Power of Dating Other Women - Variety Brings
Spice to Life!
I have decided to bring upfront this important aspect of the
dating scenario - multiple choices of women that lie ahead of
all of us. This should be one of your primary priority area of
consideration - because it is under your control if you so
decide.
There happens to be existing a bit of dichotomy in this dating
game - mostly created by women themselves. For your
understanding, I want to break the existing myth - women do not
like men dating more than one man. Did I hear someone say -
Monogamous?
So many times I have heard some one say something on similar
lines: - This one's made just for me. - I knew she should be
just right for me - I know my soul mate, when I see one - God,
help me, I don't want to lose her
The lists of such exclamations are endless. A man meets a woman,
finds her extremely beautiful and desirable, and then goes and
spoils it all by idolizing her. He instantly puts her on a
pedestal and from then on his entire world revolves around her.
What a waste, what a mistake!
This kind of infatuation and fixation is a sure no-no for women.
It kills any sense of excitement and thrill expected to exist in
a budding relationship. Let me take you through a discussion,
where I analyze WHY you should keep on seeing other women, even
if you have your eyes fixed on one.
1. Attitude and confidence - Open other windows
When you are "fixed" or "stuck" with only one woman, you
immediately shut out any buffer zone - or the comfort zone,
which all of us need, in case something goes seriously wrong. In
case she gets you out of her life - you spend the next few
miserable months, or even years, thinking what is it that you
said wrong, did wrong or hurt her unintentionally. Remember that
song of the Beatles - Yesterday? You keep on longing for that
single Yesterday.
Since you have pinned all your hopes, aspirations and dreams on
one solitary woman, you have lost all your sense of balance and
proportion. Our inherent "fear of loss" arises out of the belief
that there are "no options" anymore. This is it. The moment you
realize - O my God, so many women, so little time, your spirit
automatically lifts up sky high. As a natural consequence, you
will relax, learn to be calm and collected in your deportment.
You no longer fear any one, now, isn't that a wonderful feeling?
2. Perspective and comparison - Compare, Contrast, Consider
If you start believing that the single woman who you have
selected is the end all and be all of life, how are you going to
assess her unless you know some other women too? You need to
draw some kind of standard parameter guidelines, by which you
can weigh the attraction level and find rationality for your
feelings. If you have nothing else to compare her with, how will
you ever know the millions of alternative behavioral norms that
even exist?
3. Perceived value - Women' envy, Owners' pride!
Women go for the Jones's. Whatever the neighbor (in this case
read it as other women) has, I must have it too. Right from
jewellery, clothes, perfume to men! A man who is popular, talked
about, seen everywhere and goes around with another woman, well,
what is he like, is there any chance for me? Make a beeline for
him! Join the race. A man who is WANTED. Who you see at the pub
is ordinary, within reach. The "unconquered" triggers the killer
instinct.
4. The Obsessive Self-destruct - Killing You Softly
Any sort of compulsion results in hasty, unrealistic and
destructive decisions. The moment the world of choices open up,
you automatically cease to show any compulsive behavior. The
essence of this message is that you see and date as many women
as there are available, till you meet the most promising one and
it should be YOU who take the final call and NOT the woman!
5. Don't let her feel "tied" down too early
Women hate to be treated exclusively right from the word go.
Even if your intention is a temporary liaison, she gets a wrong
signal. She immediately concludes that you are intent on a
serious monogamous relationship. Now her pace and sense of
rhythm does not allow this. The whole episode then becomes full
of disharmony.
So the take home is message is this: Keep your options open.
Keep all windows open. Date as many women as you like, more so,
if you have located the woman of your dreams. Do not
over-indulge or spoil everything by idolizing her. To keep her
interests alive, see other women. It pays, both in the short and
long run.