In Northern Canada there are two seasons, winter and July. When the back roads thaw in July they get muddy. Trucks traveling the back roads leave deep ruts that become frozen when winter returns. When you enter the backwoods you are greeted by a sign that says, "Drivers, please choose carefully which ruts you drive in, because you'll be in it for the next twenty miles."

Mark Twain gives us the following advice. "The secret to good conversation is leaving out the wrong words."

The same thing can be said about your own conversations. Choose your words carefully; you may have to live with the disastrous consequences for the next twenty years. I've seen many friendships, and business opportunities sabotaged because someone pulled the trigger before they assessed the consequences. Words, once spoken, can never be recalled.

So what I call quick-draw, "shooting from the lip" words or comments are opportunity killers. Although some try to fluff them off as just "misspeak" they are still irreversible disasters in the making. "Of course if your language tools are limited and your verbal options are in short supply, you are just shooting blanks. Your verbal options probably need expanding. Learning and crafting your message with new, powerful and influential words and phrases is a must in our "you don't get a second chance to make a first impression" world.

WHY DO SMART PEOPLE SAY STUPID THINGS?

It's all about habit.

Somewhere in our past we heard our habitual pop-off comments and thought they were clever. We adopted them into our speech patterns. But what you thought was clever may sound mean or smart-aleck to others. That favorite expression so carelessly thrown out could live on to haunt you for life.

SO WHAT'S THE SOLUTION? As Mark Twain said "The secret to good conversation is leaving out the wrong words."

So the solution is simple, throw out the old and replace with a verbal upgrade. Acquire new alternative ways of expressing yourself. Make your conversations so powerful others want to be with you and give you your way. You'll be surprised what you can get when you ask for it the right way. Better words always make things better.

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