It is a psychological fact of life that children are looking for limits, guidelines and boundaries for their behavior. Children any age experiment, test and seek to discover what the world has to offer and how what they do affects themselves and their surroundings. Although children protest loudly when limits are set, without boundaries they feel out of control. Without limits, appropriate impulse control does not develop. If children are unable to find limits, they continue to push, becoming anxious when there seems to be no end to how far they can go. With their immature, inexperienced egos and impulse control as their only defense against the world, they unconsciously want someone to stop them so that they can feel in control and, therefore, secure.

When parents fail to set limits, children (no matter their age) feel unimportant and unloved. Limits and negative consequences for breaching them, on the other hand, reassures children that they are noticed and that someone cares.

Children learn from the consequences of their behavior. Behavior that is followed by positive consequences is maintained or increased; behavior followed by negative consequences decreases or stops. The following techniques, which need to be modified to suit the child