An infertile couple may feel that they are losing control of their lives if they seek help and receive treatment and this may lead to feelings of anguish and helplessness. Ensuring that couples have accurate and relevant information to enable them to make informed and appropriate choices about their treatment will help alleviate these feelings.

Some couples may exclude themselves from certain situations to avoid contact with pregnancy, babies or children and this may reduce valuable sources of support such as family and friends. As many couples do not discuss their infertility with their families some benefit from attending self help support groups where they may be able to openly discuss their situation and concerns with others who share similar experiences.

Men and women have very different emotional reactions to infertility. Over a four and a half year period, Monarch (1993) studied couples who were experiencing infertility. He discovered that whilst depression was strongly felt by women, none of the men interviewed reported any particular nervous problems in connection with their infertility. These gender differences for coping with their experiences may be partly culturally defined. Typically, women value inter-dependence and similarity whereas men value autonomy and independence (Read, 1995).

These differences may lead to conflict within the relationship as each partner copes in different ways. Men, for example, may keep their anguish to themselves focusing to a greater extent on their partner