If you are divorced, do you feel upside down? Does anything look the way it used to?

Before your divorce, did you put on a happy face when you went out in public, even though your life was falling apart? Did you try to portray the perfect life: a happy family and the ideal marriage?

For many people going through a divorce, the reality of their home life was something quite different from what was portrayed to the world. Then, when they went out on their own and tried to make a clean start of it, the outside world judged them as having made a mess of their life.

Feeling good about yourself is difficult when everything as you know it has been turned upside down, and others are judging you negatively.

Getting your life back together after the divorce is very much like cleaning house. You have the rugs steam cleaned; the furniture moved in order to sweep and mop under it; and the laundry done. You wash the windows, paint the walls, and get rid of the worn-out or unnecessary collected litter. In the middle of the process, your house looks like a bomb went off. Now imagine that a friend stops by, sees the total disorder, and moans,