The Master Key to Personal Change (Really!)

What if I told you that there is one thing you can do that would make more of a difference in changing your life than anything else I know of? What if I told you that this thing can be done almost anywhere, can be performed by anyone, is free, takes no special equipment, is stress reducing, and even relaxing? What if I told you that this thing, more than anything else you've tried, can truly change the way you live, the way you relate to people, the way you perceive the world and most importantly, the way you think and feel? Would you do it?

Well, many of you have already tried it and given up. Some of you are doing it and some have never tried it. What is it? It is meditation. Now before you groan and sigh, hear me out.

In my own journey for personal growth, I've tried many, many techniques and methods. I've studied with many therapists, coaches, teachers and masters. I've attended workshops, seminars, and teleclasses. All of the strategies that have helped me grow are in my own personal tool box. I use many of these techniques in my workshops and my coaching. But the one that I depend on in my personal life the most is meditation.

Meditation is like a foundation for the house (self) I'm building. It is like preparation of the field for planting by clearing and tilling. Many of the tools and methods I've learning worked well because of the foundation (meditation) on which they were built. Meditation's effects are cumulative and can be very subtle. You may not even notice on a day to day basis that changes are occurring. Then one day you look around and notice that you are clearer, less stressed, calmer and have a feeling of being "more" you. One of the more profound effects of meditating is the strengthening of the "witness" or "observer" part of myself, that is, the part of me that observes how I am acting or reacting and notices the emotions I feel, but is not "hooked" by them. This witness function is vital to personal evolution.

fter all, it is what gives you the observation or insight in the first place. If you cannot observe what you are doing, you cannot gain understanding and/or change it. This is where real growth occurs. When you have a strong witness within, you have distance from what you are feeling and reacting to. This keeps you from being totally at the mercy of your thoughts, feelings, sensations and reactions. What an incredible relief!

The obstacles to meditating are the same obstacles we have to doing anything that is new or may actually be good for us. Our ego gets involved and tells us we don't have time or the space or can't figure out how to do it or we don't feel like it today, etc.

I find that daily practice works best for me. You cannot have a bad meditation. Every meditation, even one where you are wiggling or have whirling thoughts or fall asleep are good meditations, because one of the main purposes of meditation is to learn about yourself. You can build a meditation habit just like you build a habit for anything. Do it every day whether you want to or not. Set aside the time, say 15 to 30 minutes to start and begin.

There are many books on how to meditate (see below for recommendations), but in brief: