In today's world of wedding planning, the traditions and roles of key individuals is ever-changing. While many books today cover the role of the lead in this dance known as a wedding, the bride, there is one role that many times goes overlooked, the role of the groom.
The groom's role is one that goes undefined in many wedding books. While today's wedding books tell brides about the roles of certain people such as the mother of the bride, the father of the bride, bridesmaids, groomsmen.etc, the books fail to mention the role of one of the key players, the groom. They go to great lengths to stress the importance of the maid of honor and best man, their duties and roles, but what about the groom? Remember brides, when your big day arrives, do not forget about that important person you're vowing to never leave for the rest of your life. He needs some guidance as to what his role is in the show, and from the looks of the internet so do you ladies.
The groom is what I term as a floater. He is the prize the bride is allowed to dangle, no offense guys, in front of her friends and family and say, "Hey! Look what I've got". Grooms, to position yourself for the most enjoyable time of your life, I advise you take the role of the peacemaker. While I agree this sometimes maybe a tough thing to do, remember that your job, whether you realize it or not, is to keep things peaceful and see to it that everyone the bride wants, makes it to the big day. Groom, take care to assure that the squabbles that typically erupt during this tense time do not permanently damage relationships that were years in the making. I advise to constantly remind everyone close to the bride "This day is about her and it is her wishes we wish to honor". Put like this, most people involved in this process will be gently reminded to keep their opinions in check, thus making you the hero of the day to that special someone, your bride.
Another helpful hint to grooms, keep the communication lines open between both families. During these tense times that surround a wedding, make sure to involve both families in the little events. For example, why not offer each side the opportunity to do readings if the wedding is in church and toasts at the reception. These are just a few of the many creative tidbits that surround this joyous day and can help ensure that it remains that way.
In closing ladies, I remind you to every now and again check in with the groom. He may have valuable information pertaining to unstable conditions that just might save you from a disaster. Don't forget, while the woman is normally the HEAD of the wedding planning, the groom is the NECK, and the HEAD cannot turn without the help of the NECK.
Michael Russell Your Independent Wedding guide.