Is it possible to get the kids to obey all the time?

Have you tried everything and it doesn't seem to work?

How do we get the kids to do their chores, homework, clean their room with a good attitude.

If the children have a safe environment and we expect them to be responsible and competent, then that is a very important first step.

If children feel safe they will be confident. If children have responsibilty they will be competent.

Remember, that we don't want perfect kids, we want happy kids.

When RULES are consistently enforced the child will have strong safe boundaries.This has been tough for me, I have always wanted to make things easy and by giving in and not being consistant I made things alot harder. Rules that are set and consistently enforced work, and they work without argument. I have waivered alot, and that confuses them. I thought I was being kind and soft hearted,instead I was sending out mixed signals. I also have learned that being consistant with a smile works alot better than being inconsistant with a frown.

Rules that never waiver work. We need to understand that there is no pushing the rules. My 9 year old daughter will only beg and plead if I have been inconsistent and if I have given into her in the past. Kids want to know where the boundries are. If I give in when I am in a good mood and enforce rules when I am in a bad mood, how do the kids really know where they stand?

My kids know that if they only have to do something once in a while; It really is not a rule.

New rules can feel unsafe at first. So try one new rule at a time. Take one step at a time, say the rule out loud and always explain to them the reasons why. Always remember life is short, so don't sweat the small stuff, these rules are suppose to make life easier with less arguing and more time to have fun.

You can have confident competent kids, they will take responsibility, if you set rules and consistently enforce them. Anytime you don't enforce a rule, apologize and explain why that was an exception and explain that the routine is back into place. Let your kids take responsibilty for their own actions. This is really tough to do, but WOW does it ever work like MAGIC!

If I could do it all over again "I'd finger-paint more, and point the finger, less.

Enjoy the Journey,

Sandra Kimball http://www.moretimeforkids.com Parenting Coach Sandra has devoted her life to her two children and has used examples from her home life, as well as, an incredible understanding of the Adolescent and Preadolecent Mind to develop a skill set for parents in need of improving their parenting skills. With Sandra's dedication and trustworthy approach to parenting, you'll Experience he Absolute Joy of Parenting.