Dating for Scaredy Cats
Dating affects us all at some time or another. For many it
happens during the teenage years and twenties, before meeting
the love of their life and settling down to wedded bliss for the
rest of their naturals.
For more and more of us however dating revisits later in life,
at a time when we're probably feeling pretty vulnerable, for all
kinds of reasons.
Mixed emotions surface as a result of divorce - have I still got
'it', am I too fat hin/wrinkled/boring/uncool... It may be that
after a serious of disastrous relationships we start to wonder
if there really is something wrong with us as people and maybe
we are simply meant to be single.
The good news is that it really is possible to turn things
around, sometimes by changing a few basic rules or behaviours so
that others can see the fantastic personality lurking within.
These tips aren't written in stone but form solid guidelines for
those scaredy cats who haven't dated for a while. They also work
for those who have an inkling they may be getting it wrong.
- Yes, you will have to kiss a number of frogs or frogesses
before you meet someone you really like. So don't take dating
too seriously and be prepared for let downs.
- Be the best you can be. Get the weight off, keep your hair
nice, find a good dentist, spend time on your appearance. It
does sound superficial, but if you don't appear to like
yourself, no one else is going to. Plus, if you're feeling good,
you'll be more confident with others.
- Talking of being the best, have you checked out your wardrobe
recently? If you met you what would you think?
- Practice being with people. Try to go to as many social
functions as you can fit in and simply talk to others, without
expecting romance, even if just for a minute or so. People love
to talk about themselves, and with practice you'll develop easy
ways of getting both men and women into conversation.
- Don't waste time on dates with people who make you feel
unsettled or anxious, or uncomfortable about being yourself. All
that will happen is that you'll start thinking there's something
wrong with YOU. Ditch them - nicely of course.
- Take time off from looking for dates and develop your
interests, so you'll have stuff to talk about when you do meet
- Sometimes it becomes clear after a while that your date will
make a much better friend than partner. If that's the case, be
honest but do try to stay in touch. Thay way your social life
will expand into areas you may not have expected.
- Don't be shy of introduction agencies. It's much more
acceptable to meet people this way these days, and there are
agencies to suit people from all walks of life.