Leave Your Needs at the Door
A good relationship enriches and enhances your life. Whether you
can attract and create an enriching relationship partly depends
on what you think a relationship will do for you.
There are two approaches to creating relationships. Some people
want a relationship in order get their needs met. These
individuals tend to have a long list of needs they are not
meeting anywhere else, and want met when they connect with a
Unfortunately, approaching a relationship to get your needs met
tends to attract partners who require you to give up or alter
some part of you.
In such a relationship, you may be told you are loved only when
you are on your "best" behavior. You may be required to take
care of your partner either financially or emotionally in
exchange for the continuation of the relationship. You may be
asked to put up with unacceptable behavior in order to continue
to get your needs met.
People who have the good fortune of creating good relationships
enter into relationships with their needs already met, for the
sole purpose of enrichment.
In such a relationship, you are free to be yourself. Because you
are being yourself, you grow and expand in ways that are good
for you. Even in compromise, you learn skills that bring about
growth. While being fully yourself, you are more likely to
communicate fully and do not have to monitor or control your
behavior. Your best attributes are brought out and highlighted.
If your partner exhibits unacceptable behavior, you are in a
position to ask him or her to instead be the best he or she can
It's your choice. You can wait until you get your needs met
through your partner and sacrifice important aspects of
yourself. Or, you can take stock of your needs now and get them
met. You will then be ready to attract a partner who will enrich
your life, so that both of you can expand and grow in love.
Which one will you pick?
Want to know which needs are good to bring to the relationship
and which needs you should leave at the door? Watch for an
upcoming class on just this subject.
Your Relationship Coach, Rinatta Paries www.WhatItTakes.com
(c) Rinatta Paries, 1998-2002. Do you know how to attract your
ideal mate? Do you know how to build a fulfilling relationship,
or how to reinvent yours to meet your needs? Relationship Coach
Rinatta Paries can teach you the skills and techniques to
attract and sustain long-term, healthy partnerships. Visit
www.WhatItTakes.com where you'll find quizzes, classes, advice
and a free weekly ezine. Become a "true love magnet(tm)!"