Ways to be Romantic
Rarely does Valentine's Day pass by without your notice. Even if
you are single and think the day has no significance, the day
will arrive and you will want a relationship more than usual. If
you are in a relationship and Valentine's Day does not get
celebrated, it will leave hurt and resentment in its wake.
I invite you to think of Valentine's Day as "Focus on Love Day,"
as opposed to "Hurt About Lack of Love Day" or "Ignore Being
Below you will find ways to make your "Focus on Love Day"
extraordinarily romantic, whether you are in a long-term
relationship, dating, or are single.
A note for people who are in a new relationships, or who are
dating someone but are not in a committed relationship. At the
beginning of a relationship, it is best not to have too any
expectations about how Valentine's Day will be celebrated. It is
also best not to get disappointed if it is not celebrated in
just the way you would want. In time, as you and your partner
get closer, both of you will be able to celebrate Valentine's
Day and other holidays in more meaningful ways.
This Valentine's Day, create a perfect "Focus on Love Day" for
yourself, regardless of what your dating partner may or may not
have planned for you. Look at the suggestions for singles below.
Then, do something small, but meaningful for your dating
partner. Look for suggestions for couples below, but tone the
activity down a bit.
And now, 10 ways to make your "Focus on Love Day"
1. The Perfect Day
Couples: See if you can start to notice what your lover dreams
about, wishes for. Listen for small, attainable things that can
make a big difference. Alternatively, subtly question your lover
about what he/she pictures as the perfect Valentine's Day. Now
take the information you have gathered and make it into a
perfect day for him or her.
Singles: If you had a partner, what would you have him or her do
to create your perfect Valentine's Day? Create it for yourself -
love yourself that much.
2. The Perfect Card + One Perfect Rose
Couples: Buy or make a lovely card and then fill it to the brim
with words of love, admiration and appreciation. By "fill it to
the brim," I mean leave no white space untouched. Present it
with one perfect rose.
Singles: Buy or make a lovely card for yourself, and just as
above, fill it to the brim with words you want to hear from your
future lover. Seal the envelope and open it on Valentine's Day.
Present it to yourself with one perfect rose.
3. Valentine's Day is Not Just for Women
Couples: Ladies, I have it on good authority that guys want to
be celebrated too. So get him flowers and candy and a card, too.
Singles: Guys, give yourself that same wonderful Valentine's Day
as a relationship partner would give you. You may feel silly,
but you will also feel good.
4. Say Goodbye to Obligation, Say Hello to Open Heart
Couples: Don't give or do anything out of obligation this
Valentine's Day. Give only from your heart, from love and
treasuring your partner. No matter how good or bad your
relationship is going, get in touch with how much you truly love
and appreciate your partner. Give from that space.
Singles: Don't beat yourself up for not having a partner. You
have not failed. You are not bad. Valentine's Day can be "Focus
on Love for Yourself Day" as easily as "Focus on Love for
5. The Gift of Undivided Attention
Couples: Give your partner the gift of undivided attention and
see if she or he doesn't find that the most romantic thing
Singles: Give yourself the gift of your own undivided attention.
Take away all of the distractions and be with yourself the way
you would want your partner to be with you.
6. Gift of Communication, I
Couples: Men, allow your woman to talk about whatever her heart
desires, and listen. Ladies, let your man talk or answer your
question without finishing his sentences for him, interrupting
him, or moving on to the next topic. See if this doesn't make
Singles: Either find a person who will listen to you the way you
need to be heard, or give yourself space and time to listen to
your own thoughts and feelings or to journal.
7. Gift of Communication, II
Couples: Ladies, give your man the gift of sitting down next to
him in silence. No talking allowed. Men, give your lady the gift
of talking and sharing from your heart. No closing down, walling
up or running away allowed.
Singles: Either silence or open heart, give yourself whichever
one you need.
8. A Gift with Interest
Couples: Is your partner into computers, and you don't know a
mouse from a monitor? Or is she into gardening, but to you a
rose is just a rose? Give your partner the gift of your interest
in something that is important to him or her. Go ahead, ask your
partner a question about it and see the smile light up his or
Singles: Give yourself the gift of time to pursue your important
interests. Take the time to do something that nourishes you and
makes you happy.
9. The Trust
Couples: Ladies, give the man in your life the gift of trusting
him to know how and when to take care of himself and you. Trust
that he will do the best he can for Valentine's Day. Gentlemen,
hold her trust sacred, and learn to listen for subtle requests.
Then honor them. The celebration of love will feel good to both
Singles: Today, trust your process and your fate. Today, trust
that you too will be loved and cherished by a partner. Today,
remember all the people who already love and cherish you.
10. A Shower of Words
Couples: Write your loved one a love letter or poem and read it
to them on Valentine's Day. Here come the tears.
Singles: Write yourself a love letter or poem, exactly the way
you would want it written by a lover. Read it to yourself out
loud and have Kleenex ready.
Plan to have a happy Valentine's Day!
Your Relationship Coach, Rinatta Paries www.WhatItTakes.com
(c) Rinatta Paries, 1998-2002. Do you know how to attract your
ideal mate? Do you know how to build a fulfilling relationship,
or how to reinvent yours to meet your needs? Relationship Coach
Rinatta Paries can teach you the skills and techniques to
attract and sustain long-term, healthy partnerships. Visit
www.WhatItTakes.com where you'll find quizzes, classes, advice
and a free weekly ezine. Become a "true love magnet(tm)!"