Getting What You Want Most From Other People
Very often in relationships we do not seem to be able to get the
one thing we want more than anything else - the approval of
other people. In fact the more we want it the more difficult it
can be to turn the situation around.
Typical approaches include withdrawing from other people so that
only those who are really interested in you will make the effort
to get to know you. The other person takes on all the risk of
rejection and you risk not having someone make the effort to
Emotionally what you really want is for the other person to like
you or to approve of you as you are. In effect you project
wanting approval and that is what you get - more wanting
approval! This is because what you give out comes back to you in
this world. However there is a better way!
It is possible to let go of wanting approval if you know the
right questions to ask yourself, then you will be able to
release the neediness and instead feel your own approval of
yourself which then causes others to reflect that acceptance
back to you.
Ask yourself, which would I rather have, wanting approval or
having approval? Ask this question again and again even for up
to ten minutes at a time and you will find that your feelings
shift and you will feel better about yourself and less attached
to getting approval from other people.
Test this for yourself when you are alone as well as when you
are with other people. I find that my breathing changes and I
start to feel more at peace within minutes when I use this