Wanting the Best for our Children

Tonight we had a little drama at our house that tested my emergency skills. Accidents and injuries are one thing, but when they happen to your little baby, it's another thing entirely. I learned that last Easter, when Sophia sliced her thumb open on what we could only conclude was the cardboard edge of a Goldfish Crackers container. She, of course, would not let us hold her thumb and put the pressure on the wound that we needed to, and therefore she kept bleeding like crazy. And yes, I freaked out. Here it is, Sunday morning, I haven't even showered yet, and my 1-year-old daughter is bleeding profusely and won't let us tend to her wound. All the "what to dos" ran through my head. How bad is it? Do I call my mother-in-law (the retired nurse) for advice? Do we go straight to the E.R.? Should I run get dressed now or wait and see if the bleeding stops? It wouldn't be so bad, except for my poor husband, has to hear me think all these questions out loud. We ended up in the E.R. for 4 hours on Easter, left with my daughter's arm bandaged up like a baseball bat, with the doctor saying "you know, all you needed to do was apply some pressure to it." Duh. You try doing that with a squirmy and crying 1-year-old. Luckily no stitches were required, though my husband had his ego inflated when the doctor suggested next time to use a little super glue to keep the skin flap shut (something Sean had suggested before we trekked to the E.R.). Fast forward to tonight. Sean and I are sitting in our recliners in front of the television, while Sophia and Andie are playing on the floor nearby. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Andie stand up, lift one of those egg crates off the floor (she uses those plastic bins to carry her toys around and make little Barbie houses), and turn around to go play somewhere else. Sophia starts screaming, her head turned away from us, and I look over and knew at that moment Andie must have accidentally smacked Sophia in the head when she twirled around so quickly. Out comes the line that is said more than it needs to be in our house: "you need to watch what you are doing, Andie." Now, Sophia has a very high-pitched voice, so I don't run to her every time she screams. Usually she is just screaming at Andie, saying "no," or "go away." So, as usual I just casually ask her if she's okay, and when she turns around in reply, I freaked out again. "Andie! What did you do?! Look what you did!" At this point, Andie just thinks she's in big trouble, until she looks over and sees what Sean and I now see - Sophia's face is covered in blood all the way down to her chin. My thoughts race...What do I do? Do I run get dressed for a trip to the E.R.? Should I call an ambulance? (Mind you, this was a lot of blood and I had no idea how bad the injury was at first). I'm running in circles freaking out, while Sean calmly goes over and picks her up, grabs a dish towel and begins wiping the blood away. It took a few minutes to figure out the blood was coming from the forehead, and that it was just two small gashes. And it only took a few minutes for Sophia to calm down, and allow daddy to clean her off, and mommy to put the band-aid on. We got the band-aid on, and I finished wiping the blood off with some baby wipes. It looked a lot worse than it really was. Sean said face wounds are always that way - they tend to bleed heavily no matter how small the cut. Poor little Andie was freaked out. I had to go in her room and console her crying, tell her Sophia was just fine, and to come out and take a look. I know how traumatizing that can be to a child. When I was her age, my brother who was maybe 3 at the time, sliced three of the fingers on his hand with a butcher knife in a Christmas morning gift-opening frenzy. He needed splints, but I was a kid, and remember crying and thinking he was going to die. Okay, so I'm not the best when it comes to traumatic situations. One thing is for sure, and that is just like most mothers, when it comes to our children, we only want the best for them and can't stand to see them suffer. For instance, I am taking Sophia to her first eye doctor appointment this Friday because I have noticed one of her eyes wandering. She will need glasses, but at least I am not faced with putting her through surgery, or chemo, or some other awful thing that some parents have to face. When it comes to our kids, no accident or injury, or health threat is ever small enough. We all just want to protect them, keep them safe, but we can't. The world is not within anyone's control, and that includes our children's lives. One mother I know is dealing with possible autism in her child. The only thing I can say to ease her guilt is "there is nothing you could have done any differently." And all of us as mothers should be taking that advice. If we are doing all society tells us we should do to keep our kids healthy, safe, and nurtured, we are doing all we can.