Planting Seeds of Peace
Inner Peace
During the busy holiday season, it's especially important to
help children to find peace within themselves. But if we want
our children to have inner peace and to be relaxed and carefree,
as parents, we need to look closely at ourselves. Children learn
by example and they are deeply affected by our emotional states.
When we are frantic and frustrated, we affect everyone around
us, especially our children. Kids have the uncanny ability to
see through "do as I say" and go straight to "do as I do." And
like adults, when children are restless, agitated, and
frustrated, they are likely to behave in a quarrelsome,
critical, irritable, and aggressive manner. Or they may express
their inner discomfort with self-conscious, anxious behavior.
Help your children to develop an 'inner calm' by making your
home a sanctuary from the overstimulation of the outside world.
Have a quiet household at night, limiting television, computer,
and video games. Make family 'quiet time' a part of every
evening: read or tell stories, listen to soothing holiday music,
or give each other a gentle massage. Teach your children
relaxation skills such as stretching, deep breathing, and guided
imagery. Relaxation can be a delightful form of play and it's
easy to incorporate the holidays in imaginative ways. For
example, play a relaxing game of Santa Says. Direct children to
stretch and relax by curling up like a snowball, to move their
arms and legs slowly in and out like a snow angel, or to open
their mouths widely to catch snowflakes.
Don't over schedule your children and cut back on the tasks and
activities that overwhelm them. For example, avoid long trips to
the mall with young children; short spurts of shopping will be
more fun for everyone. You may decide that you'd rather spend
less time shopping, give fewer gifts, and participate in more
activity based celebrations and activities that you can share
with your child. For instance, spend time with children making
cards, decorations, and cookies.
While routines are likely to be thrown off during the holidays,
it's important to maintain a consistent bedtime, allowing plenty
of time for a relaxed bedtime routine. Don't let holiday parties
or activities interfere with your child getting a good night's
sleep.
Compassion
Genuine compassion is a wish for the well-being of other people
and for every living being in the universe. Again, as parents,
we need to be role models for our children. Just as children
pick up on our emotional states, they also emulate the way we
treat others. When a waitress or a sales clerk takes a little
longer than you'd like, your children will notice whether you
are understanding, or demanding.
Compassion comes from a feeling of empathy--an ability to put
ourselves in someone else's shoes and understand how they feel.
Help children to realize that in the important ways, they are no
different from other children all around the world--and that the
Earth is home for all of us. You can cultivate empathy and
compassion by telling your own stories about children in other
parts of the world, emphasizing that they share the Earth with
us and have the same feelings, fears, hopes, and dreams.
Encourage compassion and empathy by providing opportunities for
your children to help others. Opportunities abound: have your
child draw pictures and help you deliver food to a housebound
friend, encourage them to donate some of their clothes, toys or
books, or regularly visit an elderly person who needs
companionship.
Acceptance
Choose holiday activities and celebrations that suit your child.
Don't try to change your child's temperament; accept that he or
she may be naturally timid and soft-spoken, or boisterous and
loud. An activity level that might be comfortable for one child
could be overwhelming for another--even within the same family.
By accepting and respecting our children, we teach them to be
non-judgmental and accepting of others.
Like our children, we have our own temperaments which will
influence how we choose to celebrate the holidays. You may enjoy
everything about the holiday season: parties, decking the halls
and shopping may not be overwhelming to you. However, you may
have a child or a spouse who prefers a quieter holiday season.
By accepting and being sensitive to each individual family
member, parents will be able to create a joyful holiday season
for their entire family.
The Dream Maker's December Dream Starters
Dream Starters are visualizations which promote relaxation,
imagination and well-being as they guide children into the world
of dreams.
Getting Ready
To prepare for these dream starters, (or visualizations), create
a quiet comfortable atmosphere in which your child can relax.
Step One ~ Progressive Relaxation (Tensing & Relaxing Muscle
Groups)
Have your child tense each muscle group for at least 5 seconds
before relaxing. (See the Santa Says Game (below), for a fun,
seasonal progressive relaxation routine.)
Step Two ~ Focus on the breath
Have your child get very quiet and watch his own breath. (See
the focusing on the breath section of the Santa Says progressive
relaxation routine.)
Step Three ~ Creative Visualization
Now that your child is relaxed, read (or tell) one of the
following visualizations...or make up your own.
Santa Says Game (Excerpt from the Christmas Dream CD)
(Progressive relaxation & focusing on the breath)
Modify the directions according to your beliefs as well as
your child's age and interests. Instead of Santa Says, you may
wish to say Mother Earth Says, or simply Simon Says. Or, if your
child is older, he may simply enjoy the movements without the
directive.
Directions:
Santa says be a sleepy reindeer and slowly, slowly,
slowly lay down on your bed.
Santa says, lift your legs up towards the ceiling. Keep
your legs as straight as icicles and point your toes. Point,
point, point. Keep your legs straight up towards the ceiling and
turn your toes towards your nose. Keep your legs straight. Hold,
hold, (pause) now rest your legs back down by your side.
Santa's elves can curl up in tiny balls, and you can too. Santa
says, be very small. Curl up in a tiny ball, hold your head up
to your knees and squeeze. Squeeze, squeeze, squeeze; now rest.
Santa wants to see if you can be even smaller, smaller than the
tiniest elf. (Repeat)
Reindeer are very kind. They're especially kind to themselves.
Santa's reindeer give themselves great big hugs, and you can
too. Santa says, give yourself a great big reindeer hug.
Squeeze, squeeze, squeeze; now lay your hands back down by your
side and rest. (Repeat)
It's important for reindeer to be strong so they can pull the
heavy sleigh full of toys. Blitzen shows Santa his strong
muscles, and you can too. Santa says, show me your strong arm
muscles. Make a muscle. Hold the muscle with your fists
clenched. Hold it, hold it, hold it. Now open your hands and
rest your arms back down by your side. (Repeat)
When reindeer wait on the rooftop, snow can get in their eyes
and snowflakes can get in their mouths. Rudolph squeezes his
eyes tightly shut to keep out the snow, and you can too. Santa
says, squeeze your eyes tightly shut. Squeeze, squeeze, squeeze.
Now, gently and softly close your eyes.
Santa says, keep your eyes shut and open your mouth wide
to catch some snowflakes. Hold your mouth open wide. Hold it
open. Hold it, hold it, hold it. Mmmm-mmmm. Now gently close
your mouth and your eyes.
Reindeer are happy and show it by smiling and showing their
teeth. The reindeer show Santa their pearly white teeth, and you
can too. Santa says, smile for me now, I'm taking your picture.
Hold it, hold it, hold it; now rest. Santa wants to take one
more picture of you for Mrs. Claus. She wants a picture of you
sleeping, to hang on the refrigerator. Santa says, keep your
eyes closed and smile for Mrs. Claus. Smile, smile, smile; now
rest.
Santa likes to let out a great big yawn and when Santa's
reindeer get sleepy, he likes to hear them yawn too. The
reindeer yawn with Santa, and you can too. Santa says, take a
big breath in and yawn out a great big sleepy yawn. Once again,
yawn, yawn, yawn. Yawn until all your yawns are gone.
Focusing on the Breath:
Reindeer must be perfectly still and quiet so they don't wake
anyone when Santa delivers presents. Reindeer can be very, very
quiet, and you can too. Santa says, be very quiet. Be as quiet
and still as the newly fallen snow. Reindeer love the feeling of
breathing in the cool night air.
Santa says, feel the air as you breathe in and out
through your nose.
Breathe in, feel the cool air. Breathe out, feel how it's warmer.
Breathe in the cool air. Breathe out the warm air.
Breathe in, 2-3-4. Breathe out, 2-3-4.
Breathe in, 2-3-4. Breathe out, 2-3-4.
Santa says, once again, feel the air as your breathe in
and out through your nose. Breathe in, feel the cool air.
Breathe out, feel how it's warmer. Breathe in the cool air.
Breathe out the warm air. Breathe in, 2-3-4. Breathe out, 2-3-4.
Breathe in, 2-3-4. Breathe out, 2-3-4.
Reindeer like to sleep, sleep, sleep. They enjoy dreaming about
the Christmas Eve ride. Santa says, sleep and dream;
sleep, sleep, sleep, and dream, dream, dream.
Visualization (Excerpt from The Christmas Dream
recording)
Santa says, close your eyes.
Think of the moon and the starry skies.
Pretend your bed is my sleigh.
Soon it will lift up, up and away.
Keep your eyes closed. Feel Santa tucking a warm soft blanket
around you. He puts an arm around your shoulders and together
you fly through the starry, starry sky. Santa looks up at the
moon and waves.
The moon calls down to you and Santa:
Yoo hoo, Santa...it's Moon, Mother of Pearl...friend to every
boy and girl.
I will shine on you tonight, following you on your flight.
First, please do me a little favor? After all, I am your
neighbor.
Come visit me, I'll share the view--then you can see the whole
world too.
You're coming, why Santa, what a surprise!
Keep flying towards me, through starry skies.
I'm glowing brighter so happy to see...
I'm finally getting some company.
You, Santa, and the reindeer fly higher and higher towards the
moon's light. The stars twinkle brightly, and the moon's light
is the biggest and brightest of all. Keep flying towards the
moon. You're almost there, just about ready to land. Santa's
sleigh lightly touches down on the moon. You're showered with
moonlight; the moonbeams warm every part of your body, from the
tips of your toes to the top of your head. It's so quiet and
peaceful here that the reindeer close their eyes to take a short
moon nap.
Santa says, Hear the silence on the moon.
The reindeer's breath plays a soft tune.
Be so quiet that you hear, the sleeping breath of each
reindeer.
Get out of the sleigh and take a walk on the moon. Notice that
the sky is filled with beautiful strings of silvery beads that
float, dance and swirl through the sky. Look past the strings of
pearls and see that the Earth looks like a beautiful blue ball.
Watch the Earth and see that it spins as it slowly moves across
the sky.
Feel love in your heart as you look at your home, the beautiful
Earth. It's time for you to go back. Santa needs to deliver his
sleigh full of presents.
Moon says,
Come back soon, you're welcome here.
Just dream of visiting and you'll appear.
You are home now. The sleigh turns back into your bed. Santa
says, "sleep now, sleep, sleep, sleep." While you sleep and
dream, Santa leaves your presents under the tree. The moon
shines brightly while Santa flies back to the North Pole.
As you sleep, prayers fill the sky, connecting the Earth as
they fly.
Variation:
Have your child take a global flight with Santa. Before going
back home, on The Christmas Dream recording children fly
over mountains, across seas, and from country to country. They
see and hear children from many lands, who are gazing up at the
moon and giving thanks.
Thanks for the moon when day is done, shining 'round the
world on everyone.
In Spanish:
Gracias por guiarme con tu luz
Esta noche con el mudo la compartir