Top Ten Ideas for Back to School

This time of year can take some major adjusting for you and your kid. Life goes from the peaceful, relaxing, and bummin' around (yeh, right) of summer to the hectic start of a new school year. I've compiled a list of the top ten ideas to help everyone deal with the changes in the schedules and to lessen the stress of the season. Just for grins, I've done this Dave Letterman style. Number 10...Teachers - make an appointment within the first two weeks of school to get to know your kid's teacher(s)...this is especially important if you are not fortunate enough to be either the custodial parent or have shared parenting...it could make all the difference in the world. Tidbit of advice: when you do talk to the teacher(s), don't tell them all of the problems you have with your ex - they are smart enough to figure that out for themselves; do tell them you need to have a copy of everything that gets sent to your ex from the school and you would like weekly updates of classroom things. Also, take along enough self-addressed, stamped envelopes to leave with them so that they can send you something every week. Number 9...Support system - when you need to be in two places at the same time, this is indispensable. Hopefully, you will find someone who is a parent of another kid in the same class. That way you can get info on school assignments and other activities. Make sure your kid knows who these people are. If someone else will be picking them up from school or an event, they will know the 'secret word' that you and your kid have come up with. When my son was young, it was 'leprechaun'. We never needed to use it, but it was ready just in case and we both felt safer because of it. Number 8...Debrief - whether you pick up the kid from school or daycare or meet them at the house, you need to know what went on all day. You can do this when you first see them after school or during dinner. Try to gauge their moods, celebrate their small (or big) victories, discuss upcoming events and activities, listen for those difficult times they have had during the day. Also, make it a routine to check on assignments, etc. that they have hopefully given to you to see. Number 7...Activities - Try to plan at least one day a week without any activities. We all need down time. I limit my kid's activities to two days a week which leaves time for school assignments, hanging out with friends, and just being a kid. This is difficult at times because some sports teams want to practice four nights a week and have games every weekend. While that may be fine once a kid is in junior high, I believe it has the possibility to limit a kid's overall growth when they are still in elementary school. Number 6...Friends - Each school year can bring changes in friendships because there are different kids in classes, kids transfer in and out of schools, etc. Time has to be made for friends, whether it is play dates for younger kids, phone calls or movies when they are older. Number 5...Play - All families are busier than we would like these days, but it is important that kids have a way to unwind after school. Your kid may enjoy playing video games, playing with neighborhood kids, working on hobbies, or have other ideas of play. Giving them 30 minutes every evening to play can make getting their homework and other responsibilities done much easier. Number 4...Study - Having a time and place to do homework or other studies promotes discipline and an enjoyment of learning. Even if your kid doesn't have a school assignment every day, you can give them small projects to work on. Maybe it would be researching about hurricanes, helping with dinner (math skills), or having them pick a topic they want to know more about and working on that. You need to be available for them when they have questions or need help, so don't go too far. Also, be sure to look over their assignments - it will keep you informed on what they doing and you will be able to give them some constructive feedback. Number 3...Read - Yep, the old standby, reading. There isn't a skill that is used more over a lifetime and it's important to instill good habits. So, let your kid see you reading every day and try to set aside at least 15 minutes for them to read every day. You could encourage them to carry a book in their backpack, to read in the car or on the bus, or even to read a book on CD or tape while they are doing other things. Number 2...Hanging out - Don't over schedule your kid's week or yours. Maybe you want to order a pizza one night a week and watch a movie or maybe you could just leave time for doing nothing and then see what your kid does with it. You can learn a lot about your kid this way. They just may surprise you in what they come up with. The Number 1 idea is to get ready...refer to 'Morning Chaos' - another article in this section. If you use the tips in it, you will be prepared for almost anything and getting ready will be a whole lot easier. Life changes are difficult. Even though the transition from summer vacation to the school year comes every year, it doesn't make it any easier. *****Readers of this article may copy it without the copyright owner's permission, if the author and publisher are acknowledged in the copy and the copy is used for education, not-for-profit purposes.