"Should You Try To Stop Your Divorce If You're Just Thinking
About Getting A Divorce?"
Thinking about getting a divorce doesn't necessarily mean that
you should try to stop your divorce. Conversely, it could be
wise to try to s top your divorce, only you know whether you
should. Just because you're thinking about getting a divorce,
doesn't necessarily mean that you should try to stop your
divorce, although its logical to automatically assume so.
In order to be clear that you really want to stop your
divorce if you're thinking about getting a divorce, you should
use any or all of the following steps to make that
determination:
Should You Stop Your Divorce?, step 1: Examine why you're
thinking about getting a divorce and clearly define and outline
those reasons.
This is a vital part of determining whether you really do want
to stop your divorce. It is easy to naturally think you should
get a divorce if feel empty, confused, alone, frustrated, etc.
But do yourself a favor, figure out what actually has you
feeling like you do and write it down. Only then will you be
able to decide whether you should make a serious effort trying
to stop your divorce.
Should You Stop Your Divorce?, step 2: Determine if guilt is
seemingly forcing you to think about wanting to stop your
divorce of if there's something inside you that really wants to
stop the divorce.
Guilt can play a factor when you're thinking about getting a
divorce, don't let it be the determining factor for wanting to
stop your divorce. If guilt is the major reason that you want to
stop your divorce, sit down and re-think everything. Ask
yourself if you'll feel sorry for your spouse because you know
how he or she will react to your decision to get a divorce. You
will know if guilt is swaying you one way or another.
Should You Stop Your Divorce?, step 3: Use projection to foresee
how how your spouse will react if you try to stop your divorce.
You know whether your spouse will be please or disgruntled if
you try to stop your divorce. You have an idea of how he or she
will react if you try to patch things up and avoid a divorce. If
your spouse will react positively if you try to stop your
divorce, you should be happy. You may have a chance to make it
work. But, if your spouse will react harshly to efforts to stop
your divorce, you should ask yourself why. Figure out what your
spouses motivations would be for reacting negatively and
determine whether or not its still worth trying to stop your
divorce or if you should just develop a plan to part amicably.
Should You Stop Your Divorce?, step 4: Think about what your
life would be like if you tried to stop your divorce and compare
that scenario with what your currently going through.
Figure out what you want out of the situation and decide what
you want your future to look like. If you feel that your life
will worsen by trying to stop your divorce, maybe you should
re-think what your planning. If you feel that you'd like to at
least try to stop your divorce, even if its for selfish reasons,
then take comfort in the fact that you've at least made the
decision to act. Also, ask yourself whether or not the life you
want is with your spouse, even if everything turned out exactly
the way you planned for it and you were able to stop your
divorce.
Ask yourself, "Even if I implement this plan and manage to stop
my divorce, is this really the person I want to spend my life
with?" The answer to this question will help you determine your
course of action.
Should You Stop Your Divorce?, step 5: Implement your plan of
action to either stop your divorce or plan to get a divorce.
Nothing will change if you don't act. Now that you've decided to
work it out or get a divorce, set a plan in motion with your
true end goal in mind. If you want to get a divorce, do what you
need to in order to get what you need out of the situation...be
amicable. You do not want to look back later on and feel like
you didn't act in a mature fashion.
If you truly want to stop your divorce, use the right resources
to determine the best course of action to do that. Divorce is
serious, you should make certain for your sake and for your
spouse's sake that you did all you could to stop your
divorce...and be happy about it!