The ADD Child: Challenging Parents, Teachers and Friends
The ADD child exhibits a series of behaviors that are common in
most children. Most children misbehave, act silly and day dream.
So what, then, is the difference? The child with Attention
Deficit Disorder exhibits these behaviors in a constant and
extreme manner, often interfering with their academic, social
and family interactions. Here are the variety of ways that a
child may exhibit ADD behaviors:
Inattention: The most visible and well-known behavior of a child
with attention deficit issues is an inability to maintain
attention and focus over an extended period of time. This
behavior shows up in a variety of situations, such as forgetting
or confusing instructions that were just given, being
inattentive when involved in a conversation, growing bored of
activities within moments, appearing to be in a daze or day
dream, and being unable to complete tasks.
Hyperattention: Paradoxically, the same ADD child who cannot
stay focused enough to finish many common tasks will have no
problem whatsoever in focusing on a video game or TV show for
hours. This ability to hyper-focus on chosen activities is very
common in the child with Attention Deficit Disorder. This
behavior is possible only because the child pursues the
desirable activity through a heightened level of excitement
which is a controlled form of hyperactivity.
Distractibility: An ADD child can be easily distracted from most
activities by any form of stimulus in the environment (movement,
color, sound), as well as by their own scattered, fast-moving
thoughts. This results in half-finished or poorly completed
tasks, constant minor non-compliances with known rules,
zig-zagging from one activity to another, and the inability for
the child to do well in group situations (such as school) where
compliance with the rules is important.
Impulsivity: An ADD child will often blurt out information in
inappropriate ways and make poor decisions relative to their
actions. This child may risk his or her own safety without a
second thought, running into the street, climbing to the top of
a tree or rock formation, or jumping or diving into a pool
without checking the depth. The child with ADD acts on impulse
rather than through logic or problem-solving. Impulsivity in
many ADD children can also be characterized by impatience or
temperamental (often oppositional) behavior since the ADD child
often feels a driving need for something (anything!) to happen
immediately.
Hyperactivity: Of all the characteristics of an ADD child, the
behavior that is most difficult for those around the child to
accept is the presence of hyperactivity. The child with
hyperactivity is always in motion -- touching, searching,
pushing, jumping, running, tapping, and squabbling with friends
and siblings. The hyperactive ADD child seems to need a high
level of stimulation at all times in order to feel OK.
Hyperactivity will also be seen in the form of a child who talks
incessantly, clowns around all of the time, and finds every
other form of trouble that a parent can name.
Insatiability: The ADD child has an insatiable need for
attention to be brought onto himself. While all children thrive
on adult attention, focus and concern, the child with ADD can
never seem to get enough. They act out, talk incessantly, joke
around, monopolize conversations, demand the teacher's constant
involvement, show off to friends, and badger incessantly until
they get their way.
Clumsiness and Poor Coordination: Many ADD children exhibit
problems with fine motor control. This can be seen in poor
handwriting and in difficulty performing other routine tasks
such as buttoning buttons or tying shoelaces. When combined with
the child's inability to plan or organize a flow of activities,
the resulting outcome (written paper, self-dressing, etc.) may
appear chaotic and disorganized. Many ADD children also exhibit
gross motor control clumsiness due to poor motor planning
cognitive skills or other co-existing weaknesses in areas such
as balance, depth-perception or eye-hand coordination.
Disorganization: The ADD child is a study in disorganization!
Whether it is the state of the child's room, the organization of
a term paper, the set up of the child's school supplies and
workspace, grooming, dressing and hygiene skills, or any other
aspect of the child's life, the most probable outcome will be a
disorganized mess. This results from the ADD child's impulsivity
(jumping at any solution), distractibility (stopping in the
middle of any activity), hyperactivity (pulling out and tearing
apart everything in sight), and inattention (they lose interest
anyway!).
Mood Swings: With an ADD child, everything is always at
extremes, and their range of emotions is no different. In some
cases, they can be extremely domineering and controlling as they
seek to gain attention for themselves. In other cases, they can
be unreachable, and no amount of discipline or parental
intervention seems to have an effect. When an child with ADD is
"stuck" in the emotions of the moment, there seems to be no way
for reasonable discussions to bypass the emotional whirlwind in
progress. ADD children can be described as oppositional,
stubborn, overly-dramatic, flighty, ecstatically happy or
excessively sensitive, just to name a few of the extremes
experienced by ADD children.
Poor Social Skills: Based on all of the issues discussed so far,
it's not surpising that ADD children don't fare well with peer
relationships. They speak and act impulsively, show off and
dominate conversations or class time, clown around at
inappropriate times, miss subtle social cues, may be physically
clumsy and awkward, and often irritate and annoy their peers in
a thousand daily ways.
As a result of the symptoms and behaviors just described, the
ADD child encounters all too many difficulties in their young
lives. True ADD should not be considered a "phase" that will be
outgrown. Rather, parents and educators should seek all of the
education and knowledge they can find to help these kids
flourish and succeed throughout the elementary school years.