THE CONVERSATION OF RECOVERY-Part Two
The listening for the Conversation of possibilities will be even
more unfamiliar than the one about the self-limiting belief.
Even though possibilities will be caused for the individual and
a sense of hope and inspiration created, there will be a
tendency at some point for the person to not belief that their
life can be truly transformed merely by creating possibilities.
Even when the person gets the existence of his self-limiting
belief, how he has been being that in his life and the impact
upon himself and others as a result, a sense of doubt will arise
that mere words or language will truly assist them in
transforming their life let alone cause them to be successful
with respect to their recovery. As with a newborn child, the
existence of possibilities once invented or created will be
quite fragile. There will be in the beginning of this
Conversation a tendency to return to being ones self-limiting
belief if for no other reason than it is familiar to the person.
The self-limiting belief is about life in their comfort zone,
from the ego, in what is reasonable and familiar to them. Even
though the individual will become enrolled into his
possibilities it is in the person's initial not getting of its
application in life that will leave it vulnerable. The
individual will return to his community and with this reentry a
breakdown will happen. The success of this process will rest
upon the individual continuing to stay in the Conversation about
his possibilities and also upon the one assisting to continue to
generate the space necessary for this creative process to be
lived fully.
The third component of Transformational Counseling is that of
enrollment. Enrollment is the process of continuing to stay
inside or live into ones possibilities and out of ones
self-limiting belief. The process or technology of enrollment
will be vital when ones starts to again experience a loss of
power, freedom or self expression which is equitable to the
negative human emotions of anger, depression, etc. When we have
such an experience our past has again reappeared for us. Such
reappearance is merely our self-limiting belief once again
determining who we are in the world. Once again our
self-limiting belief is driving our bus. The process of
enrollment allows us to get the inauthenticity that we have
created by again being our self-limiting belief. Enrollment
allows us to get present to what we are pretending about the
experience and what we are hiding. The pretense is always about
another person, place or thing and with it there is the
experience of some sort of sense of threat and blame. The story
from pretense has something to do with the other person,
situation or circumstance causing us to feel a certain way.
Enrollment technology allows us to get that we created the
pretense, the story, and furthermore what the experience is
truly all about. Becoming present to what is hidden from us in
the experience allows us to again make the distinction of our
self-limiting belief and that which is truly creating the
experience. It is our self-limiting belief that actually creates
the breakdown due to the individual's sense of inadequacy with
respect to the situation, circumstance or interactions with
another. Once we become present to that which is creating the
inauthenticity we are able to give it up through enrollment and
again reinvent ourselves through the creation or even
regeneration of our possibilities. Once a person does enrollment
with himself the inauthenticity he created disappears and with
it the individual's power, freedom and full self-expression is
once again restored.
The creation of possibilities will begin a process of bringing
forth action. The individual who takes on creating possibilities
for himself and his life will become very motivated to do and be
differently in life. With the creation of possibilities the
person will experience a renewed sense of power, freedom and
self-expression. However, it is in this breakthrough of creating
possibilities that the person will eventually experience
breakdowns in the various domains of his life especially when he
begins to live life on life's terms. When the individual returns
to his community, to life as it was before the recovery process
started, there will be a tendency to experience breakdowns. When
one returns to his community there will exist a discrepancy of
how he was being before his transformation began and how he is
being now from possibilities. When one returns to his community
there will also be a tendency to return to familiar ways of
being and dealing with the circumstances and situations of life
and even other people. It is within his return that the
technology of enrollment will be crucial to his continued
transformation and recovery. The use of enrollment will allow
the person to get how he is actually creating the breakdown
himself, to get how he is creating a story about the situation,
circumstance or others and most importantly the source of this
creation, his self-limiting belief. The self-limiting belief
generates the context from which the world occurs for us.
Knowing that he is creating this experience from the background
of his self-limiting belief will give him the power to choose,
the power to return to being his possibilities thereby allowing
him to experience the circumstance, situation or another in a
manner that is in alignment with or from his possibilities.
The Daily Plan is the fourth component in the utilization of the
technology of Transformational Counseling. Transformational
Counseling is not merely about understanding the power of our
thoughts but ultimately about action. We live in a world of
action and for us to make a difference in our life as well as in
that of another we must ultimately create through action. The
Daily Plan allows one the opportunity to begin to create their
life anew by assisting them in monitoring their day-to-day
activities and behavior. As our possibilities will call forth
action, the Daily Plan allows one the opportunity to begin to
create their life differently by planning what they will
specifically take on or do to create or bring forth their chosen
possibilities in their lives. The Daily Plan is about making a
commitment to oneself to fulfill on their intentions, to fulfill
on being their possibilities. One of the fundamental elements of
this structure is how will an individual measurably bring forth
his possibilities into his life, how will he go about
practically creating them for myself and in the world. The Daily
Plan also allows one the opportunity to stay present to his
self-limiting belief as it arises in the act of fulfilling on
his Daily Plan. Having a breakthrough with the creation of
possibilities and especially with their implementation in life
will eventually create a breakdown too. With the use of a Daily
Plan the person will have the opportunity to become present to
what is stopping him and as a result get back into generating
his possibilities through enrollment and as a result continue to
create from the present.
While the use of the Daily Plan will support and assist the
individual in his transformation and recovery, there will also
be a tendency to not complete it on a consistent basis. The use
of the Daily Plan is antithetical to the existence of the
self-limiting belief, with the way of being the individual is
very familiar with. In addition to assisting the individual in
creating the life that he wants and to be able to distinguish
his self-limiting belief as it reappears, the Daily Plan is also
about ones commitment and integrity both to himself and others.
When the individual develops or creates his Daily Plan he will
be making a commitment to himself and others, to what he says
that he wants to create in his life. Once the individual's plans
for his transformation and recovery are made real by committing
them to written form in his Daily Plan, it will become an issue
of integrity, of doing what he said he would do, of doing
complete work with whatever he does and of doing what he does as
it was meant to be done. It is only be staying in integrity and
fulfilling on his commitments to himself and others that he will
be able to live into his possibilities, to transform his life.
The individual will either be his self-limiting belief or his
possibilities and it is through his integrity that he will have
the opportunity to become present to his commitment or intension
in life. The Daily Plan is a powerful technique that will
effectively assist one in his transformation and recovery. The
Conversation is the fifth component of Transformational
Counseling and is about enrollment and the self-limiting belief
reappearing in ones commitments to his Daily Plan. While
identified as the fifth component of this process, the
Conversation actually begins when one is introduced to the work
of transformation. It will always be a question of whether or
not one will stay in the Conversation to continue to do the work
of transformation after enrollment has taken place. However, the
Conversation is about communicating with another through the
enrollment process. It is in the Conversation that we have the
opportunity to begin and continue utilizing the technology of
Transformational Counseling. There will always be breakdowns in
life even as we utilize the work of transformation. When we once
again experience a loss of power, freedom and self-expression
our past has reappeared again in our life and with it a
breakdown. Staying in the Conversation with another person
within transformation will give us the opportunity to become
present to the inauthentic way of being that we have recreated
and also to create the space for us to experience another
breakthrough. It is only in a Conversation with another where we
get the stories that we invent in the pretense about others,
situations and circumstances that we will have an opportunity to
also get present to that which is hidden from our view, the
context, that which is truly creating our breakdown experience.
That which is hidden is always from our past and has to do in
some manner with our self-limiting belief. Furthermore, it is
only from this distinction that a clearing will be caused to
live in possibility again. The Conversation is about enrollment,
enrolling ourselves and assisting others through enrollment. It
is only in communication with another that we can continue to be
and live into our possibilities and with it stay in the work of
transformation with another and ourselves.
Harry Henshaw, Ed.D., LMHC http://www.enhancedhealing.com