Aging Gracefully: Enjoy a Vital, Fulfilling Life Regardless of
Age
A quick web search on the term "graceful aging" brings up
phrases like:
Combat the signs of aging
Who said that we have to age?
Defy the aging process
These phrases reflect the fact that most of us look at aging as
something to be resisted for as long as possible. Regardless of
how liberated we've become, many women and men still experience
aging as a threat to their sense of self worth and quality of
life.
To age gracefully in a culture which idolizes youth requires
inner strength and wisdom. I've discovered two basic
requirements of graceful aging. To borrow from the Serenity
Prayer, graceful aging requires the "serenity to accept the
things we cannot change; courage to change the things we can;
and wisdom to know the difference".
Certainly acceptance of aging is a key to aging gracefully --
but which of the changes that commonly come with age are the
things we cannot change and which are the things we can change?
Aging Factors We Cannot Change
One thing we absolutely cannot change is the fact that every day
brings us closer to death. This one fact alone may account for a
great deal of our difficulty with aging. As soon as we see signs
of aging, we are reminded that this body is eventually going to
die. As we age, we come face to face with our mortality, and to
deal with this we must rely upon our spiritual resources. Our
spiritual health may well be measured by how we face the fact of
our mortality.
There is more of a gray area when it comes to identifying what
else we cannot change, as we are only now starting to make
scientific discoveries about the aging process. Nevertheless,
there are some changes that are clearly inevitable as we age.
With menopause, both male and female, we begin to live with a
different hormonal environment. The appearance and function of
our body changes and we must adapt. Our roles change
dramatically as our children grow older and leave home, and we
become grandparents rather than parents. At some point, many of
us become parents to our parents as they enter their final
years.
Growing older also brings more loss. Not only is there loss of
many aspects of being young, more people we know die. This may
be one of the most difficult aspects of aging. If we haven't
learned to grieve earlier in life, the all-important tasks of
living with loss must be learned to avoid psychological and
health problems.
What We Can Change: The Myths of Aging Revealed
Now that we've outlined a few of the inevitable aspects of
aging, let's look at some myths about aging to reveal things
that can be changed. Attitude has an enormous role in how we
age. Since much of the decline that people experience with aging
comes about due to the belief that this decline is inevitable,
examining these myths can help to free us to live happier, more
vital lives as we age.
Myth #1 - The older I get, the worse my body will feel. The
increasing stiffness and aches & pains that often come with age
are not a result of age, but are due to lack of movement (if you
don't use it, you'll lose it). Although there are some changes
in our tissues as we age, we can continue to remain remarkably
flexible and free of pain through something as simple as regular
stretching.
Myth #2 - It's too late to start taking care of myself -- it
won't do any good at this age. A healthy lifestyle has been
found to be one of the most important factors in how we age.
Improvements in lifestyle (with the 3 key areas being good food,
exercise and regular relaxation and rest) have been shown to
bring improvements at any age.
Myth #3 - I'm getting too old to learn new things -- Research
shows that older people can, and do, learn new things. Attitude
plays an important role here -- if you think you can't, you
won't try. People who believe they can learn new things do!
Myth #4 - Sex is only for the young. People can, and do,
continue to enjoy sex well into their senior years. We are
sexual beings throughout the life cycle, but sexuality is
experienced differently at different ages. Changes in hormones
will affect our experience of sex, and we may need to find
different ways to be intimate. Relaxation is key here so that we
don't panic when things don't happen the way they used to. We're
not over the hill, but simply need to give ourselves some
breathing room to become familiar with our changing physiologies.
Myth #5 - The older I get, the less attractive I become. There
is nothing more attractive than someone who has aged well.
Haven't you ever noticed that special radiance of an older
person who is at peace with themselves and life? Attractiveness
has absolutely nothing to do with age!
It's never too late to change the two most important ingredients
to graceful aging - attitude and lifestyle. Some of the most
effective lifestyle changes are the simplest. Relaxation and
stretching are extremely effective tools for successful aging.
You can start with either of them right now. Incorporating these
two simple things in your daily routine can make a world of
difference in how you age!