Winning My Battle With Anxiety

I was very outgoing as a child. I'd put on plays in front of my parents, sing to records and put on shows. I was like that all through both elementary school and high school. Nothing scared me and my aspirations were high.

I began college as a Theater major and switched midstream to a Communications major. I pictured myself as the next big 'News Anchor'. I'd even auditioned at the Connecticut School of Broadcasting, impromptu, and got accepted.

At the age of twenty, during my sophomore year in college, I lost most of the sight in my left eye. To say I was frightened is an understatement. I was terrified. But, I handled it like a trooper, even on those nights when I was alone in the hospital not knowing what was wrong with me. When family visited, I appeared strong. At night, I cried alone.

Shortly after I got out of the hospital I went to see a stage production of "Fiddler on the Roof". I remember it well because that was the first of many, many terrifying experiences. It was when I had my first anxiety attack.

During the show, my heart began racing so fast I thought I was dying. My chest constricted and I couldn't get enough air. I hyper-ventilated. The more I panicked, the worse it got. I ran up the isle of the theater and headed straight for the phone. I needed to talk to my parents. I didn't know why, but their voices were what I needed to hear. I thought I was going crazy.

Immediately, my doctor was contacted to see if any of the medications I was given for my detached retina were the cause. The answer was no. I was told to go home and lay down.

The subject wasn't brought up again, but I suffered the attacks in agonizing silence.

About seven months after my loss of site, I was out with my fianc