New York City is the Center of the Universe
New York, NY - It was discovered yesterday that New York is,
indeed, the center of the Universe. Pooling the resources of the
American Astrophysics Association, NASA, and We Are The World
(NYC, that is), the four-year study analyzed the gravitational
pull of the Universe and other factors.
"So?," asked Mike Spano, 23, from SoHo, "this is news? I've been
telling everyone this for years."
Dr.John Smithberg, PhD, from WATW(BTI), said, "When I earned my
degree, from NYU, I knew that proving New York City was the
center of the world was my calling."
The study used advanced analysis tools on the data from the
Hubbel telescope. They were able to calculate, based on astral
rotations, that the gravitational pull of the Universe was
centered around New York City.
As with many studies this one is not without controversy. Based
on the data it seems unclear whether Wall Street or Broadway is
the actual center. From some numbers the exact center seems to
be Broadway and 34th Street. Other numbers indicate the small
deli shop on Wall and Rector.
"Who doesn't know that New York City is the center of the
world??" Sammy DaBull, 21, from the Upper East Side asked. "All
my friends agree with me!"
The study also added that there is no need for people from NYC
to know about anything outside of New York. It explains that,
while it helps to be aware of The Jersey Shore and Miami, there
is no need to know where such states as Louisiana and Canada are
Copyright 2005 Cy Yablonsky. Cy Yablonsky is an Associate
Realtor with Othello Realty, you can visit Othello Realty at
http://www.OthelloRealty.com. Feel free to reprint this article
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