OH OH...IT'S OCTOBER!
Copyright The Quipping Queen 2005
OH OH - IT'S OCTOBER
Or, it's Merry Monster-Mashing Month of course!
This is the 10th month of the year, which should mean a measure
of good luck ...that is if you like things beginning with one
and ending with infinity!
There are however more than a few munchkins out there who are
not at all happy with the month of October. This 31-day period
of perturbations probably has a great deal more to do with
things that go bump in the night than many care to admit in
front of their friends and family.
So if you're really into positive stuff like a belief in the
Great Pumpkin, Casper the Friendly Ghost, or the Jolly Green
Giant...life should be hunky dory for you this month. But, if
you've had your fill of Wailing Werewolves, Monster Mashers, and
Testy Trolls...then you probably could do with a few feisty
things to do to keep your mind off the origins of a
blood-curdling scream in the night, not to mention oodles of
thumping, whacking and whomping to give you Goosebumps.
So, without further adieu...here are a few things to celebrate
this month:
October 1: Ask Someone Who Cares Day! (The trick here is
to come up with an easy answer for a question you never asked
from a person who's not on your radar screen!)
October 2: Paper Airplane Tournament Day! (For talented
armchair pilots with a penchant for paper, a strong sense of
competition, and lots of time on their hands!)
October 3: White Elephant Appreciation Day! (Time to name
your favorite government boondoggle, the biggest waste of time
and money, which gets your goat!)
October 4: Chia-Pet Remembrance Day! (In honor of all
imported plants in clay pots that sprout weird hairdos overnight
and scare the living daylights out of you!)
October 4: Save the Shush Day! (Actually the "Shush"
sound is the international symbol for keep your mouth shut in
the library, in school, and in the workplace so people can hear
themselves think or at least look very busy so no one will bug
them!)
October 5: International Pssst! Day (This positive action
day to celebrate the wonderful world of juicy gossip not to
mention the goodness gracious grapevine.)
October 6: Toothless Appreciation Day (Discover the joy
of verbal communication with a dental dam or better yet...
without a terrific set of tantalizing teeth or dazzling
dentures).
October 7: One-Horse Recognition Day (This is a day to
celebrate everything small, limited, little, or single floating
about in the universe looking for a place to fit in).
October 8: Casper the Friendly Ghost Day (Time to
reminisce about out the old Saturday morning cartoons about a
smiley-faced vapor state who adores people...not like your
average scary ghost that frequent places you wouldn't be caught
dead in naturally!)
October 9: Pumpkin Patch Appreciation Day (A great day
for visiting a nearby farm to spot "The Great Pumpkin" to keep
the witches & weirdoes happy on Halloween!)
October 10: Turkey Recognition Day (They say there's a
turkey in every crowd ...so who would you like to baste or roast
tonight...just for fun of course!)
October 11: Grimm's Fairytale Appreciation Day (Turn off
the TV and get out all those scary, gory tales about kings,
magic and talking animals...no not your fiendish relatives!)
October 12: Bedroom Slipper Recognition Day (Finally you
can don your slippers and wear them to school, to work, or to a
posh party tonight ...are you happy yet?)
October 13: Kissing-Cousin Appreciation Day (This is a
day when you get to send a greeting to some long-lost relative
or a friend you've overlooked, just to let them know you haven't
forgotten their whereabouts, or why you're not on the same
wavelength).
October 14: Libra Appreciation Day (Keep your eyes peeled
for indecisive, irritable, overbearing sulky folks who hate loud
arguments, confused situations, ugly places, and sloppiness but
adore green, purple and pink not to mention emeralds and
elephants).
October 15: Slipslops Awareness Day (Oh what ho, time to
recall all those tasteless, watery foods that you'd just as soon
not see on a menu or your plate anytime soon!)
October 16: Nixing & Hexing Awareness Day (Now you can
practice your hocus-pocus mind-control techniques to see if you
can put your pesky plants or pets in their place.)
October 17: Snool Recognition Day (Time to pay homage to
"funny" fools...those who flaunt their foolishness or flatulence
before the public in all manner of outrageous ways).
October 18: Giggleotamus Awareness Day (Celebrate those
in your life who giggle when young, snort when old, joyfully
reject questions, and laugh at topics like: "The Bicycle as a
Factor in Genito-Urinary Diseases, Prostatitis, Prostatorrhea or
Prostatic Catarrh" or "Voyage Up the Amazon and the Lion
Smacked His Head Off".)
October 19: Ode to Purple Day (If you've always avoided
the color purple, you might want to use today to ponder the
question why, or if you love it...why on earth would you pick
it?)
October 20: Stopwatch Appreciation Day (This is a fine
day to put "clockocrats" to shame by proclaiming a time-out to
appreciate what happens when all the clocks stop ticking).
October 21: Barriers Built By Bores Day (A day to
recognize all the barriers built by bores, clones or drones who
wish to keep the status quo firmly in place at all costs).
October 22: Vampire & Werewolf Recognition Day (A day of
celebration for monster-mashers who need these naughty nemeses
to justify their merry-making existence!)
October 23: Snooker Awareness Day (Forget about those
blessed balls and pockets ...and recall the times you've used
your sniffing and smelling abilities to ferret out important
information).
October 24: Plastic or Elastic Virtue Appreciation Day
(Time to honor those thinly disguised compliments or magnificent
mission statements that amount to diddly squat!)
October 25: A-Musement Park Day (Imagine what it might be
like to be locked up for life in a cage with the Jolly Green
Giant, Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, the Pied Piper, the
Abominable Snowman, or the One-Eyed-One-Horned Flying
Purple People Eater!)
October 26: Maze & Labyrinth Awareness Day (Time to
identify the most confusing, convoluted, or quaint public
service devised to help people if they only knew which door to
enter first, where to go and who to speak to who knows what's
really going on.)
October 27: Man-Made Toxic-Waste Awareness Day (What
wasteful things do you think you can live without? Junk food,
junk mail, junk products, junk entertainment etc.)
October 28: Dry As Dust Day (A timely day to recall all
the subjects of conversation that you find dull as dishwater,
stale as burnt toast, or simply dry as dust for Pete's sake!)
October 29: DELIGHT Day At Last! (A celebration of
everything in your life that simply delights you, inspires you,
and makes your brief stay on planet earth very worthwhile)!
October 30: Wild Goose Chase Day (A fun-filled day when
you get to plan and implement your very own "Wild Goose Chase"
on some unsuspecting soul of course).
October 31: Halloween of Course! (A day when all the
Great Hags, Harpies, and Heathens dress up in colorful crony
costumes to woo witches, curse cockamamies, or bob for apples!)