Have You Missed Your Soulmate?
Many people believe in love at first site. They believe that in
an instant, they will know who they should be with for the rest
of their lives. Unfortunately, these unrealistic expectations
often end in divorce. On the other hand, some couples spend 10
or 15 years getting to know each other before marriage. They'll
live together, make major purchases, and even have children,
before making a commitment to get married. Unfortunately, many
of these marriages also end in divorce because even though they
committed with their heads (and maybe even their hearts) the
couple didn't know how to make a soul commitment. Finally, some
people go along being unhappily single. They desire to be
married, but they find themselves playing games and dating
without setting realistic personal goals for their future. Maybe
you're one of the people I've mentioned above. You're in a
relationship (or your waiting for one), and you're wondering,
"Is this it? Have I really found my soulmate?" What if I told
you that knowing your soulmate has more to do with knowing who
you are and your level of commitment, rather than finding the
"perfect match" to complete you? I bring this up because I came
across a book entitled Sacred Marriage: What If God Designed
Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy? It made me
think about how true soulmate relationships are formed: God
prepares each individual and brings them to a point where their
souls can effectively be knitted together for His purposes. With
this thought in mind, here are three ways for you to recognize
your soulmate: 1. The communication between the two of you is
transparent. "In his excellent book, Why Am I Afraid to Tell You
Who I Am?, John Powell describes the five levels of
communication: cliche, fact opinion, emotion, and
transparency."-- From Starting Your Marriage Right, by Dennis
and Barbara Rainey. Transparent communication means you and your
partner can move beyond the cliches, facts, opinions, and
emotions to a level where you are both vulnerable, but where
truth prevails in your relationship. Transparency doesn't come
quickly for most people, but when it does, freedom is not far
behind. Transparency comes only with courage, nonjudgemental
attitudes, and most importantly, trust. And this leads me to my
next point. 2. You and your soulmate will trust each other
completely. That means you don't have to wonder if your loved
one is doing something inappropriate, without thought to your
wellbeing, or without sound judgment. Trust comes when words and
actions line up to form a coherent picture of the person you
love. 3. You and your soulmate know the meaning of unconditional
love. One may say, "Keishia, how can you believe in such a
concept in this day in age? This kind of love never happens in
real life." I'm here to say that it does. If you've read some of
my other articles, you'll note all of the things that must be
stripped from a person's character (selfishness, pride, and
jealousy) in order to get there. We can't get there by our own
will, but rather by God's grace and by understanding His nature.
No matter how hard we try to do it in our own strength and
conviction, leaning on divine intervention is the only way to
rid ourselves of these three character flaws. Ultimately
successful soulmates aren't just born at some point in time or
space to hook up by sheer coincidence. They are made over time
to be with each other for a lifetime. If you're wondering where
yours is, look inward and upward and you're bound to discover
more than what you've seeking.