6 common marriage mistakes
Every marriage starts with a lot of hope and dream
about life long association filled with love and
togetherness. But very few marriages fulfill the hopes
of the participants in totality.
There are various reasons for this but here we single
out 6 of those. Every young person who is planning
marriage should be aware of these most common pitfalls.
1. Marrying for the sake of love without first
checking the depth of love.
No denying that all relationships start with a sense of
love and mutual liking. Committing to a long term
relationship like marriage solely on the basis of that
feeling of love is a mistake. Because most of the time
this kind of feeling is superficial and can not pass
the test of time. Romantic feeling dies as time passes
and far more important issues like 'family background',
'values', 'religious faith', 'financial stability'
raise their head, and these issues are of real
importance which almost every body with feeling of
mutual love ignore.
2. Marrying someone who does not share an interest or
hobby.
While marriage with a person who does not share an
interest or hobby does not itself make the marriage
unstable, presence of such an interest or hobby can
make life more enjoyable for both the partners. And
this can make a real difference so while selecting life
partner this aspect must be taken into account.
But for some reason or other this aspect is often
overlooked before marriage. And efforts start after
marriage to adapt the partner to one's own interest or
develop a new common interest. While that is not an
impossible task, the process of adapting may become un-
palatable and may lead to unstable marriage.
3. Not knowing what questions to ask for checking
compatibility.
As discussed earlier that marriage decision based on
initial sense of love may be counter productive. To
make a marriage successful one should do some simple
homework. Knowledge of future partner's background and
certain other things can play a crucial role here. But
many young persons either do not try to know all these
important facts or do not know what are important
aspects s/he must know to make their marriage
successful.
4. Thinking proper and careful quarries may offend
her/him.
One may think that too much investigation about future
partner's back ground may not be a good idea. As the
other partner may find it distasteful. This kind of
thought process keeps many young man and woman from
asking the right questions before marriage.
5. Depending too much on a friend or relatives
recommendation.
A sizable number of young man and woman often get
married on the recommendation of relatives or friends.
While generally relatives and friends are regarded as
well wishers, marrying on their recommendation is not a
good idea. As their knowledge of a person can never
equal to the knowledge the person has about herself or
himself. So the person to be married is in a much
better position to select compatible life partner. Best
way out is acting on their recommendation only after
successful completion of compatibility check.
6. Getting married to make somebody else happy.
Sometimes people get married to make someone else
happy. It may be parents or it may be relatives. There
is no problem in making someone happy if that does not
jeopardize one's own marriage. But most of time in such
cases marriages occur without exercising enough
caution. As a result one may end up marrying someone
not compatible.
If you are really serious to make your marriage an
exciting, loving and enriching experience you need to
be careful about the above things before your marriage.
Tapan Sarkar
About the Author
Tapan Sarkar,
Ask right questions before your marriage.
http://findyoursoulmatetoday.com