How I Got Rid of the green-eyed Monster called Jealousy.
I am ashamed to admit this but I used to have the green-eyed
monster tailing me wherever I went. It was my shadow and my
other half.
Of course jealousy justified its presence and suspicions. It
was there to protect me. Jealousy kept telling me what I should
be doing and feeling. It even told me what my partner was up to
and how he should be behaving and feeling toward me.
Did I believe jealousy? You bet I did. That went on for years
until I learnt a few painful lessons and decided that it should
go and leave me alone for good. That happened too late though.
My suspicions when jealousy set in cost me broken
relationships, distress and a deep plunge in my self-esteem and
worthiness.
Having gone through what I did, I have a few points here to
assist you from allowing jealousy to ruin your life.
The first thing to do is to simply make a decision to get rid
of that feeling. That means telling yourself that you have had
it with the attitude of being suspicious, distrusting and
possessive.
Next start saying different things to yourself. Jealousy is
going to remind you that if you focus on other things, your
partner may abandon you. Tell it firmly that you are in control
and you want to choose your own thoughts.
Have respect for yourself. If your partner abandons you, put
your hurt behind and start life over. If he actually cheats on
you, he is not worth your time and effort. Your life will
continue to evolve no matter what happens, if you decide to make
it so.
Learn how to trust and expect good things to happen. One of the
reasons why we suffer is because we unconsciously expect bad
things to happen. Develop faith and confidence in your
relationships. It promotes better understanding, avoids stress
and gives you a peace of mind.
Learn how to communicate effectively. One great tip, don't nag.
Here's another, don't bring out old issues and mistakes. Both
irritate and put a stop for further constructive conversations.
Learn to listen without interrupting, judging and probing.
Allow him to talk and finish his sentences. If you must ask, do
it with the intent to seek understanding. He can tell from your
words, gestures and body language if you are sincere.
Now the last but most important thing is to learn to love
everyone including yourself unconditionally. No strings, no
bargains and no threats.