Here it comes folks, The Most Depressing Day of the Year: January 24

If you've been surrounded by bad energy recently, and it seems to be building, we now have a formula from a researcher to explain why: January 24 is the peak of an accumulation of things we hate: foul weather, debt, fading holiday memories, failed resolutions and a lack of motivation in general. In my part of the country, you can throw in allergens. It's cedar time in south Texas and we are topping the list of cities in the nation on www.pollen.com . And for some reason the researcher didn't factor in "illness." It's the peak of the cold and flu season. Allergens, bacteria and viruses assault our immune systems which makes us sick, and also over-reactive emotionally. Being emotionally over-reactive, down, and having low mental energy, in turn assaults our immune systems. What a nasty feedback loop. "It's too cold to go for a walk," we say, and then get depressed about that; and being depressed, we lack the energy to bundle up and get the exercise, or even to drive to the gym. What's happening here? There's also SAD - in many parts of this hemisphere, it's dark for long hours, and we aren't getting enough of the kind of bright sunlight we need. SAD stands for Seasonal Affective Disorder and you can read about it here http://www.nmha.org/infoctr/factsheets/27.cfm . With increased hours of darkness, we produce too much melatonin, a sleep-related hormone thought to be associated with depression. Whatever it is, we go to work in the dark and we come home in the dark; isn't that enough?? It's a full month since that cozy warm holiday-time, and Valentine's Day is looming on the horizon. With nearly 50% of the adults in the US divorcing (and single), that's not the thing to look forward to it used to be, but more of a reminder of what many consider failure. What else has failed? Most New Year's resolutions have been broken by now. It's depressing to write about this, and you may not like reading it, except that knowledge always allows us to cope. It also helps to normalize what you may be feeling. Does it help to know that everyone else is feeling the same way? It sure does to me, because it moves me from isolation to connection, and erases thoughts of my own foibles. It becomes a general mood, like the holiday spirit. In that sense I don't take it personal. However, when I wrote about this last year, I received one email from a distressed young man who thought my bringing it up was "really depressing," and it was "all nonsense" and he "didn't feel that way." I think there may be some over-compensation and denial there, i.e., someone who over-reacts, getting depressed at the thought of getting depressed sort of thing. For most of us, there are some down times, and we learn to get through a bad afternoon, or even a whole crummy day. Developing your emotional intelligence helps with this tremendously, of course. There's nothing worse than just feeling an overall angst and not being able to name it, claim it, and therefore, tame it. For many people, much of the time, mild depression, the sort we get from time-to-time can be assuaged by knowing about it, developing emotional intelligence, getting some brisk exercise, sticking to or returning to some kind of sensible health regime, including a good nutraceutical this time of year, and, well, just common sense. Perspective and sense of humor help too. I'd give a Most Depressing Day of the Year party if I had the energy. (That's a joke!) Distraction works well too. I went to college in Minnesota, and so many of the kids had trouble at the end of January, they instigated a "winter break." It felt to me like the cure for a sore finger is to poke yourself in the eye with a stick. The kids who lived nearby went home and had fun, I fantasized, or at least got to be with loved ones, while (grump, whine) those of us who lived too far away (airfare being far more prohibitive than it is today) hung around the dorm with nothing to do thinking maybe those cancelled classes weren't so awful after all. The antidote, someone said, is salt - tears, sweat or the sea. (The antidote to what? Well, you know, just THINGS.) If you can't be on a cruise January 24th, you can immerse yourself in work (it's a Tuesday this year), or put on a Verdi area and shed a few tears, and last it out, knowing it's temporary. Another thing you can do is work on your thoughts and self-talk. Like, if this is the most depressing day of the year, then any other day of the year is going to be better, and that's something to look forward to! Use your EQ smarts and plan ahead. It's probably not going to be a great day, okay, and it's going to be especially rough on those who don't have much self-awareness. Schedule a massage, call your coach, have a good book handy, book some time with a kid or a dog, and smile!