A Horse Named Focus
Many people choose a goal, a plan, and pump themselves up enough
to take action ... for a while. But most people find that their
focus varies from day to day and circumstance to circumstance.
In fact, most people eventually lose their focus altogether and
fall right off the horse.
Remember the last time you fell off the horse? What did you do?
If you were able to muster up enough focus you got back on the
horse, no big deal. Being on the horse and getting on the horse
require focus; that's the point of having the horse!
So how do you get focus and keep it?
One way is to remind yourself not only of what your goal is, but
why, exactly, you have the goal. Your goal should be written
down somewhere you'll see it every morning and every night. But
don't stop there! Loss of focus isn't likely to happen in the
middle of the night or while you're getting ready for work. Keep
a "goal card." This is a note card with your goal written on it.
Keep it in your pocket and read it throughout the day. Through
experience I've found that my focus was lost during certain
circumstances. If my goal was to lose weight, it was difficult
to pass on the invitation to have lunch with friends at a
restaurant I knew wouldn't serve me anything on my diet. This
was an important time to take a "goal break" in the restroom
(for privacy) and read my goal card. Why is it that I want to
pass on this invitation? Oh right, it's because I want to lose
weight because I want to look and feel better. And exactly how
is that going to feel? This is the time to shut your eyes -
remember, you're in a private place, like the restroom - and
imagine how you'll feel when you've lost that weight ... or
whatever your goal may be.
Side note: I need to clarify something. If you've agreed to do
something (i.e., lunch) and then gone on your secret goal break
and decided against your agreement, it IS okay to come back out
and tell people you've changed your mind. Maybe you're not
feeling well or you remembered you have to run to the bank for
lunch, etc. Or maybe you're not bashful about your goal and you
don't mind telling them point-blank that you're not going
because you're on a diet.
Repeated Exposure
Your number one tool for maintaining focus is repeated exposure
to the feelings you expect to experience when your goal is
accomplished. Read your goal morning and night, keep a goal card
on you at all times, and don't hesitate to read it at various
times throughout the day.
Experience your goal!
When you read your goal card, morning, night, and in between,
don't just read it - experience it! Think about how it's going
to feel when you accomplish this goal. Saying, "It's going to
feel great when I have a million dollars," just doesn't quite
capture the moment of your future accomplishment. Close your
eyes and really experience the goal.
Support from others
Enlisting the support of other people is a great way to keep you
on track and improve your confidence in your ability to
accomplish the goal (I call this Goal Confidence). Tell a friend
about your goal and ask them to say something to you every day
that uses the phrase "... when you achieve [state your goal
here]." For example, if you want to have a million dollars, your
friend needs to say something to you like, "It's going to be
great when you have that million dollars!" Instruct them to be
serious about this and not get cute with their phrases. This is
a very effective tool for goal accomplishment.
Support groups are another great resource. If you believe one
exists, look for a group of people who want to accomplish the
same goal as you. The members of this group should encourage
each other as well as help each other come up with new creative
ways to accomplish the goal or overcome obstacles to the goal.
If you're unable to find a support group for your goal, consider
looking for a group at MyGoalGroups.com.
Mark your calendar!
Marking your calendar with important dates such as milestones,
obstacles, or other goal related events will keep you focused on
the big picture. If you have a support group, consider sharing
your important dates with the other members.
Fall off the horse?
Everyone falls off sometime. Remember: It's just a horse. Climb
back on and use those spurs!