A Question of Rejection

Copyright 2005 Rasheed Ali We keep going back, stronger, not weaker, because we will not allow rejection to beat us down. It will only strengthen our resolve. To be successful there is no other way." - Earl G. Graves Have you ever been afraid of being rejected by others? How do you feel when others reject you from their "world" or because you didn't do something to their liking? Do you care? Well the FACT is that most of us do care AND we let this type of rejection rule our lives. The problem is Fear of Rejection is a MAJOR obstacle that most people never realize is controlling their lives. You see, wanting to be accepted and please others is a very human and natural thing which begins very early on in life. HOWEVER... As we get older and form our own beliefs, we also seek to belong to and associate with people who have concurrent beliefs. At whatever age, this is when the Fear of Rejection begins. When we do things that our social group does not like or is against their beliefs (regardless of what) we experience rejection in some form. Rejection comes in many forms, but is usually NEGATIVITY from family, friends, customers, or business associates. This fear of not belonging or not being accepted often stops our progress. So what's the solution? Well, my friend Mike Litman experienced many rejections, sarcastic remarks and was even laughed at when he was trying to get his book published. "Who wants to read a book with interviews you had with millionaires," they said. Little did they know that Mike wouldn't let that stop him because, "Conversations With Millionaires" went on to become an International Best Seller and Mike a self made millionaire! The truth of the matter is that NEGATIVITY and INDIFFERENCE can make you successful despite what you've been told. Here's how... The most successful people or the high achievers of this world, do things that others don't or are not willing to do. They are willing to pay the price for what they want including experiencing rejection. They work harder, they work longer and they take the negativity of others, become indifferent to what they say and use it to achieve their goals. Yes, EVEN if its family. Some time ago a friend of mine was taking care of his terminally ill father. He did anything he could to make him comfortable regardless of his own well being. His family said nothing. When his schedule was too hectic to make it to his father for just one day, his family had endless negative things to say. This rejection caused him to avoid being rejected at any cost, even his own health. He began spending more and more time with his father. Finally his health DID begin to deteriorate, due to lack of rest and he crashed. One day he sat and thought of where he went wrong only to discover that he was avoiding rejection and trying to please everyone all the time. Fear of Rejection clouded his judgment and caused him to risk his own health. FACT - Rejection causes reduced IQ and impulsive behavior. I've found the above to be true, only if we let rejection conquer us. So your solution... "BE LIKE MIKE" Take the negativity, conquer it with indifference, and use it to achieve your goal, wealth, health and happiness. "Dear to us are those who love us... but dearer are those who reject us as unworthy, for they add another life; they build a heaven before us whereof we had not dreamed, and thereby supply to us new powers out of the recesses of the spirit, and urge us to new and unattempted performances." - Ralph Waldo Emerson