STOP! AND NAME YOUR INTENTION
I usually write two newsletters a month for my website, but
recently I missed an issue. I had gone away on a "rustic
retreat" weekend, and although I had intended to write it before
I left, it just didn't happen.
When I got back I felt pressured to get down to work, but felt
unfocused and distracted. When I was younger I would simply
force myself to do things I really didn't feel like doing. My
method for writing term papers in college was to keep a bottle
of wine next to the typewriter. The wine kept the anxiety at bay
so that the words could come out on paper. Well, that's just not
an option anymore!
It's not even a question of not wanting to do the work. I CHOOSE
to write my newsletter. No one says I have to, or sets a due
date, but me. Some people mistakenly conclude, by the way, that
because they are anxious about something, or put something off,
that they aren't good at it or aren't meant to do it. That's not
necessarily true.
How often are you confronted with something you want to do, or
need to accomplish, but find it hard to stop, focus, and sit
down to actually do it? If you work for yourself, and set your
own schedule, this may come up quite often. Maybe you make these
excuses to yourself:
* "I can't create unless I have peace and quiet." (You may live
in a household where there is never peace and quiet, and so you
find you never create anything.)
* "I have to get my work space organized before I can create."
(Does anyone remember the "anal-retentive" series of skits from
Saturday Night Live years ago? I can picture the "Anal-Retentive
Gardener" taking so much time to prepare and get his tools ready
that he was never able to get to the actual gardening
demonstrations he wanted to show.)
* "I'll do these chores first, and then I'll feel more like
doing X." (If you know this is your MO, you may label yourself a
procrastinator which makes it even more difficult to proceed.)
We may keep ourselves in mental and physical motion because we
don't want to stop and be present with ourselves. (Those of us
in recovery know how familiar it can be to "not be present.") In
my case, I could also have thoughts generated from the "inner
critic" like: probably nobody wants to read my newsletter
anyway. Who am I to think I have anything to say?
I'm not going to buy into that. And you don't have to, either,
for whatever you're working on. Here's a method, borrowed from
creativity coach Eric Maisel, which will center you, clear your
mind, and focus your intention, if you let it. It is a
six-breath, six-thought, one-minute technique. Read these
guidelines before starting:
* First, ground yourself, with both feet planted on the floor.
Once you are familiar with the instructions you can shut your
eyes.
* Take long, deep breaths. Breathe easily - not forcing - but
deeply, letting your abdomen expand on the in-breath and
contract on the out-breath. Try counting to five on the inhale,
and five on the exhale to make sure the breath is full and
unrushed.
* If you notice that you're rushing, or letting stray thoughts
in as you do the exercise, consciously center yourself and quiet
your mind.
* The parentheses in the instructions below indicate how you
will divide up each thought for the in-breath /out-breath. On
the inhale think "half a thought" and on the exhale think "the
second half of the thought." For example, for the first thought
in the sequence, you will breathe in for ("I am completely") and
breathe out for ("stopping").
* Name the work you want to accomplish the moment you finish
centering. There is power in naming your intention. Ask
yourself, "What would I like to designate as my work this time?"
It might be a concrete work you want to tackle, or a state you
want to be in. This is the phrase you will insert in the blank
parentheses of #3 below. For example:
(I am writing) (my newsletter)
(I am making) (that phone call)
(I am ready) (for the conversation)
READY? HERE'S THE CENTERING SEQUENCE:
1. (I am completely) (stopping)
2. (I expect) (nothing)
3. ( ) ( )
4. (I trust) (my resources)
5. (I embrace) (this moment)
6. (I return) (with strength)
Practice the sequence several times right now. (If you feel
like putting it off, even though it will only take one minute,
ask yourself why you've read this far but are unwilling to do
the exercise.) Take your time, paying attention to the quality
and length of your breaths. Notice how you feel when you're done.
Whether you employ the Centering Sequence above, or use some
other technique like mindfulness meditation or the Remembrance,
the task of bringing yourself into the moment still remains.
In his book Coaching the Artist Within, Maisel reminds us that
the process of creating requires a centered presence. If we are
scattered, anxious, rushed, or uncentered, we squander our
chance to create.
I think this applies as much to creating our full lives in
recovery as it does to creating a book or a work of art, or a
newsletter. Intention and being present, showing up for our
lives, counts for a lot.