Attitudes and Gratitude
Attitudes and Gratitude
"Gratitude turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order,
confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house
into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of
our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for
tomorrow." Melody Beattie
Once with a group of women, we were discussing why it is that
some children who seem to "have it all" are pleasant and
friendly while others become spoiled. After sharing our stories,
we drew the conclusion that the difference rests in the attitude
and teachings of the parents. Some children "expect" to have
certain things, and they soon become spoiled and unwavering.
Other children remain thankful and appreciative.
Think of adults you know that fit these descriptions. Whom do
you know who has a chip on their shoulder or feels the world
owes them something? Whom do you know who greets each discovery
with appreciation? It is easy to guess who is happier and more
fulfilled.
Developing a thankful attitude, goes a long way toward
developing a more resilient and appreciative self. Here are a
few ideas for spreading the attitude of gratitude.
Think about the whole process. When you receive anything, be it
a child's drawing or an expensive purchased gift, focus on how
much time, effort, and thought went into the gift. Taking the
time to realize how much work, caring, and thought a person has
given you is a wonderful way to deepen your appreciation of both
the giver and the gift.
Realize each day is a gift. There are so many things that we
take for granted. Many times we don't realize how much we
actually take for granted until tragedy strikes. For example, I
always enjoyed my brother and never imagined we would lose him
at age 27. It wasn't until after this tragedy that I learned
each day and each moment we have is a precious gift. Don't be
wasteful or unappreciative of these moments.
Lower your expectations. I knew a woman who felt that she had
such a series of bad luck that the world surely owed her
something. I couldn't stand being around her; she complained
about everything. If it rained, it seemed the sky was out to get
her. When we quit expecting the world (or people) to give us
things, we can become more focused on enjoying the gifts that do
come our way.
Sarah Ban Breathnach in her best-selling book, Simple Abundance:
A Daybook of Comfort and Joy, advocates the use of a gratitude
journal. She cites this as "a tool that could change the quality
of your life beyond belief." I completely agree. The premise of
the gratitude journal is to record five things that you are
grateful for each day. Some days you might have to be creative
to find five. Other days you might have ten or twenty! Value the
little things. Value the person who sincerely smiled and asked
how you were at the grocery store checkout. Value the soft touch
of a child's hand on your shoulder. Value a new song that you
hear on the radio.
Create your own gratitude journal and list five things that you
are grateful for each evening. Notice how this deepens your
appreciation for life and helps to maintain a positive outlook.
You may also want to start a "Family Gratitude Journal" where
each night you think of five things that you are grateful for as
a family.