What is Speed Dating
Speed Dating started in Los Angeles as a way to assist Jews to
meet Jews, but from here it has snowballed and lost it's
religious connotations. Now it is little more that musical
chairs, a quick turn round the room with an equal number of men
and women, speaking to them all for a very few minutes. Usually
the maximum number of minutes you speak to the person is eight
minutes, which may seem short, but think about it, you can
usually determine whether a person is interesting in eight
minutes, and that way long enough to know if the chemistry
works.
Depending on the site you will have between 6 and 12 dates in a
night. Fortunately you have a piece of paper to record what you
think of the person, because you may be having trouble at the
end of the night remembering who was what. The problem has been
made worse in that the modern trend is for three
minutes.Obviously speed dating will work better when you are
situated near a metropolitan area.
If you are going to judge whether a person is interesting in a
few minutes, then this type of date is very visual. However,
this does not necessarily mean looks here, a winning smile from
ear to ear is going to have more impact than a long face. The
only disadvantage that I can see if you have one or more
physical defects, that you do not compensate for. However there
are psychological tips for you to improve your odds. Some people
say they don't know what they are looking for, and others go
against their original preferences, but psychologists, say that
people can be aware of this in three seconds. So, I guess if you
have a speech impediment then this type of dating is not for
you.
HOW DOES IT WORK Who uses speed dating, more or less everyone,
some events are open to anyone and others are age specific. Some
are geared to specific events.
If you have a look at some of the Internet sites, that offer
speed dating, then you will see that most people go and expect
to get a grilling, and are then pleasantly surprised. The
atmosphere is relaxed, and there will be a hostess there to put
you at your ease. Most give you a number tag, which means that
your anonymity is protected. After the initial chat the ladies'
sit at the table and are joined by the men for the number of
minutes. Then the men have to leave and move on to the next
table. Apparently between the "bells", you have time to make
notes. In some cases the hostess reviews the notes sheet and
reveals some of the comments. I guess that this will be also
anonymous, but it can be a helpful way for you to improve your
technique. Many of the events also have a tip sheet regarding
the questions you should and should not ask. It appears that
most events have a policy that you cannot ask what a persons;
occupation is, and that does restrict you from asking about a
huge chunk of most peoples' day. It is less like an interview
than it sounds. The personalities have to come across otherwise
it would be boring. The technique must work, because the idea is
mushrooming all over the globe, and not many people are daft
enough to keep going to something that is not fun, and does not
produce dates. All of us at some time or another has wasted an
evening, or a month or even more on relationships that do not
work, this offers a fast and effective weeding out tool.
WHAT SORT OF QUESTIONS SHOULD I BE ASKING Let's assume that you
only have three minutes, so you need to sure of the questions
that you want answers to. This is not a time to get tongue tied.
Keep your questions simple, whilst at the same time asking
pertinent questions that will have revealing answers. Are you
religious? How would you change your life?
What do you like to do for fun? You can be as imaginative as you
like, questions such as "What is your idea of perfect bliss?"
could potentially reveal a lot about some ones personality, as
well as there preferences. Whilst you need answers to questions,
so does the other person, so it is important to be able to
listen to what the other person is saying, and not monopolize
the conversation.
WHAT IS THE COST OF SPEED DATING Of course it varies, but you
can be looking at up to $45 for an evening that lasts 2-3 hours.
However you can get more than one date out of that.
It is only the concept of speed dating that is fast, it is not a
race to mate, so have a fun evening and try it. Maybe you find
the concept scary, but then so was bungee jumping and that has
been around for years.
One thought that I did have, is "What to Wear?". I can see that
question is not that hard for men, the answer is probably smart
casual. However, women have enough problem deciding what to wear
for one date, never mind meeting a whole group of people. It is
one thing to dress to impress for one guy, but a plethora is
another story. It does seem that most events do not enforce a
strict dress code so wear what is comfortable and makes you feel
good. If you normally power dress, then don't try jeans, or vice
versa.