"The Spiritual Poverty of the Gay Lifestyle Today!"
"The Spiritual Poverty of the Gay Lifestyle!" by Stewart McCloud
THE EARLY YEARS Fortunately for all Americans the 1960's, 70's
and then 80's led first to greater sexual freedom and liberation
- and then to greater sexual honesty, The internet boom of the
last decade solidified those gains to the extent that there can
likely never really be a return to the sexual "dark ages". THE
GAYS & THE "THREE B's" Gays and Lesbians had historically lived
prior to the Stonewall Riots lives of quiet desperation "in the
closet" facing overt hostility and repression every day of their
lives.
After the STONEWALL RIOTS - our gay and lesbian brothers and
sisters overall marched straight out of their closets and
eventually right down MAIN STREET or FIFTH AVENUE or MARKET
STREET or SANTA MONICA BOULEVARD in their festive PRIDE PARADES
across North America and now across the world. Many gays and to
a lesser extent Lesbians want to be open about their sexual
orientation - while this is NOT the case with most bisexuals -
especially happy bisexuals.
Soon across America there were dozens of openly gay bars, adult
bookstores, and bathhouses in every major North American city.
Gay Community Centers sprouted in most every major North
American city - save San Francisco - where until recently the
community was so fractious they could not even open such a
center! Gay Community Centers with time became Gay and Lesbian
Centers - then GLBT Centers and soon to be GLBT and P -
polyamory - and Q centers - Queer.
Maybe one fine day even the new, trendy METROSEXUALS will join
the sexual minorities to party and to parade!
The GAY PARADIGM - which emerged as a result of this desire for
being OPEN - was often confrontational to the larger straight
community with a certain "WE'RE QUEER and WE'RE HERE!" element
in far too many areas of America. In the gay era before AIDS the
fact of life was that the gay community was hijacked by the
THREE B'S who made a killing - and also ultimately killed off
thousands if not millions of gays. They are the BARS, the BATHS,
and the BOOKSTORES. Their agenda was to make FILTHY LUCRE and
they did so rapaciously for years and years. Gay communities in
these early years - including their activists and journalists
became dependent on these deep pockets but they too were all too
often caught in the thrall of the 3 B's AGENDA - even hidden
agenda of SEEK BUT DO NOT FIND.
Even today the "beau ideal" of the American gay community is
some twenty-something twink or hunk or military type - portrayed
again and again for decades endlessly and all but mindlessly.
This beau ideal type can never be snared and brought home to
one's bed - save at a hefty price (escorts and models or trade)
- much less to one's life and family! Billions have been and
will continue to be made on the backs and knees of these 18 to
25 year olds who are then cast off for next year's "model".
Nothing is sadder than meeting a middle-aged towel boy at a gay
bath or spa or a broken down bartender at some gay bar who
openly laments that he was once "somebody" in the gay limelight
years ago.
The NOT so secret moneymaking agenda of the POWERS THAT BE in
the gay community - the 3 B's and their legion of co-
conspirators was "SEEK BUT DO NOT FIND". Gay men HAD to go out
as often as possible to the bars, the baths or the bookstores -
as they might be missing out on something or someone. Even if
they found someone it was and is all too often a one-night stand
if not a 15 minute standup. One gay friend recently admitted to
me he had not had horizontal gay sex since the AIDS epidemic was
full-blown (i.e. two decades). While many gay men do find
long-term committed relationships - as the new Gay Episcopal
Bishop of New Hampshire - far too many will regale you with
Elizabeth Taylor-esque tales of their 13 husbands and numerous
affairs - few lasting more than a season or two. BUT - the 3 B's
want gays "to seek but do not find" - to be good consumers -
good customers! I attended University of California's Hastings
College of the Law in San Francisco in the early 70's and one
openly notorious homosexual law student openly proclaimed that
his small gay bar and its 11 long-term regular patrons who
cashed their every paycheck there paid his way through law
school. He admitted that over two dozen such "regulars" were
openly feted at all major holidays and their every birthday to
keep them as "regulars".
Even to this day - the GAY PARADIGM - the GAY COMMUNITY is still
trying to shirk this "seek but do not find" rigid pattern.
Unlike many happy bisexuals - gays and even many Lesbians - are
still under this spell - notwithstanding that even the major gay
mecca cities San Francisco and New York closed the gay baths -
gay bars are half in number or half full today -yet the adult
bookstores - and videos - and pornographers are richer than ever
- harvesting a new crop of young twinks and studs for their 15
minutes of fame every season of every year until the end of
time. The internet has been a major boon to pornography and
pornography sales worldwide especially in the gay "beefcake"
market.
THE THREE B'S REPLACED BY MAJOR MERCHANTS OF GREED
Things - largely due to AIDS as well as long-term maturing gay
and lesbian community - have changed and are changing - but the
change from the "3 B's" holding the community in its thrall has
morphed into gross and crass materialism as soon as the major
marketing gurus found the Gay and Lesbian NICHE of affluent
consumers with huge discretionary spending who were eager to
"Seek and Find" and then "Seek and Find" again - consumer goods
and luxury travel and the like. NOW the vast majority of the
FORTUNE 500 companies market to the Gay and Lesbian Community
noting in their marketing circles that the Gay and Lesbian
market is one of the larger and more affluent segments of
today's marketplace. Gays and Lesbians who were already as
average American consumers easy prey for materialism and
consumerism were even more easily influenced when buying this
and that product led to acceptance by this or that major
corporate icon, this or that major world conglomerate - tied
with greater status and greater rank in one's millieu.
HERE COME THE ALTERNATIVES:
Finally, after this gay party and Pride parade - then gay +
Lesbian party and parade - was far along - here come some
welcome alternatives. The Metropolitian Community Church has
been with us for decades and has sought to help fill the
spiritual hunger of many gays and lesbians who want to find that
solace and inner peace in a gay and Lesbian religious setting.
Many mainstream Christian churches have embraced the gay and
lesbian community in many outreach programs as the Churchof
Christ and the Unitarian/Universalists and the gay and lesbian
support groups and organizations within their home churches as
Dignity, Integritry, and the Brethern and the like. Islam
offered up "Gay Muslim" groups and there are many GLBT groups
for Jews, Buddhists, and other faiths. Many gay and lesbians
have also explored alternatives to organized religions with New
Age thinking, yoga, Scientology and other stops on that long
travelled road the American pursuit of happiness trail.
Microcosm vs. Macrocosm: Maybe gays and lesbians just finally
caught up with the mainstream of American life - gross, crass
materialism being catered to and cajoled into more and more
consumer spending and more and more consumer debt to "Seek and
Find" and then continually in yet more and more rounds of
self-indulgence and over-indulgence to "Seek and Find" again and
again. Sadly there is no "silver bullet" for the Gay and Lesbian
community nor American society as a whole. When and where will
we all find something more valuable, reliable and relevant -
than buy, buy, buy and more, more, more? When?
Best Wishes,
Stewart (Mac) McCloud, Founder/President, Bi MEN NETWORK,
www.bimen.org - 1/4 million men with us today!
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